Advice Can Change Dreams In An Instant

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a great start.

Have you ever decided there was something you were going to do, a goal you wanted to accomplish, but you didn’t want to tell anybody else? Making the commitment to do something positive should be one of the happiest moments of our life (aside from actually accomplishing it), but all too often we hold it in because we don’t want to deal with the inevitable responses.

You see, when you share a dream with somebody, rarely do they just say, “That’s awesome!” There’s always a more in-depth response, usually focused in one of three directions. Quite often, they’ll try to talk you out of it, explaining all the reasons it’ll never happen. You know, “for your own good.”

Others will tell you what a great idea it is, and how much they hope you succeed, because they want to be in your inner circle in case you actually succeed. But all too often, those same people are having a laugh at your expense around the water cooler. “Did you hear what Jim’s trying to do? And he thinks he can pull it off! I think he’s got a screw loose.”

And then, there’s that very small group who gives your plans a little thought, and then says, “You know what? That’s awesome! And I know you can do this. How can I help?” Okay, it’s not usually a group, even a small one. If you could find one or two people who respond in that manner, you’re among the truly blessed. Hang onto friends like that. They’re pretty rare.

But consider this – when somebody shares their dreams with you, how do you react? Do you look at the possibilities instead of the challenges? Do you focus on the qualities of that person that makes them most likely to succeed? Do you point out those attributes? Do you build their confidence? Do you offer to help?

More often than not, the reason we don’t share our dreams with others is because we know how we’d respond if they shared the same dream with us. We mean well. But nobody wants to see a friend bang their head against the wall trying to accomplish something the whole civilized world knows is impossible. Right?

So, instead of offering help and encouragement, we offer advice … well-intended, but very often, badly misinformed. Because, unless you’ve already done what they’re trying to do, you really don’t know what it takes to be successful. You may have read stories or heard people talk of their own failures. But that’s all second-hand knowledge. In a court of law, it would be inadmissible.

And, in all honesty, it’s inadmissible in the mind of the person receiving your advice. They don’t want to hear it. They’ve already decided to do something grand, and the last thing they want to hear is a litany of reasons they can’t succeed. So, all that insight you shared so freely goes in one ear and out the other. You may as well have saved your breath.

It would be great if that’s how the story ends. But it’s not. Because when you share your thoughts with another person, they don’t just go in one ear and out the other. A little bit sticks somewhere in the middle, whether the recipient wants it or not. It falls onto the subconscious, a place in the brain where every thought is truth, and every opinion is fact.

You may not have talked your friend out of their dream, but you have planted the seeds of doubt in their mind. They begin to question something that, before you came along, seemed certain. Let a few other people share similar thoughts, and before long failure becomes the expected result. They can’t shake that nagging thought – “Why are you even trying this? You know it’ll never work!”

When you see somebody who’s about to make a huge mistake, it’s natural to speak up. But there’s a fine line between keeping somebody safe and holding them back. And here’s the question – is it a huge mistake in your mind, or in theirs? What is the real cost? A little time? Some money? The ridicule of people who don’t share their vision? Maybe that’s a risk they’re willing to take.

Before you offer that advice, consider the potential impact against your expertise and motives. As a friend often says, there are a lot of thousandaires offering advice on becoming a millionaire. And there are a lot of entry-level workers with opinions on what it takes to become an executive.

Keep that in mind, as you offer advice to others and as you receive it from them. Every thought that enters our brain, verbally or otherwise, finds a resting place where it can have a profound effect on our ability to succeed. Make sure the thoughts you share and receive are worthy of that power.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Feed Your Brain the Good Stuff

Good morning! I hope you all had a nice weekend.

We spent the weekend 1000 miles from home, with a group of friends and business associates we haven’t seen since last year. It was great getting back together, seeing familiar faces, and sharing our common goals. Nobody even cared about the snow outside. In fact, some were actually excited about it because they’d never seen snow before. I guess it’s all a matter of perspective.

As I said in Friday’s message, there’s something about getting together with people who believe in the power of dreams. You feed off one another until there’s an energy in the room that just can’t be extinguished. And just in case anybody had doubts, we had an excellent lineup of speakers to reinforce that energy – people who have already accomplished more than most of us could even think about.

But you know, the reality is that not a one of those speakers has any special gifts or talents that set them apart from everybody else in the room. Sure, they have a more impressive list of accomplishments, and the confidence that comes from achieving those goals. But beyond that, they’re really no different than anybody else.

My mom always used to caution us against thinking too highly of somebody else, just because of their status or the things they’ve accomplished. “They put on their pants the same as you do, one leg at a time.” Okay, she had a couple of other analogies as well, but I won’t mention them here. Suffice to say she was pretty certain the bathroom exhaust fan works equally hard for all of us.

In my years as a stand-up comedian, I worked with several celebrities. Onstage, they were larger than life and the entire crowd was like putty in their hands. But back in the green room, they were no different than anybody else. They had the same hopes, the same fears, the same insecurities, and the same basic needs. No matter what a person has accomplished in life, that never changes.

Still, there was something about being able to sit in a room backstage and chat with somebody who knows how it feels to be on top of their game. Somebody who’s been where you are, knows what you’re up against, and has the benefit of experience to offer advice on avoiding some of the pitfalls and capitalizing on opportunities.

Something I’ve learned over the years is that, with very few exceptions, the people who are the most successful are the most willing to share their insight with others. They’ve grown past any feelings of concern that somebody else is out to take their place because they know that’s just not how it works. Besides, there are few compliments more sincere than somebody who’s willing to take your advice.

We all want to feel validated. That includes people who have racked up an impressive list of accomplishments, as well as those who are just beginning the journey. A sincere compliment can open the door for you to ask questions, maybe even ask for advice. And the validation they give you by sharing their insight in worth more than you may ever know. It tells you they believe in you.

Beyond that, there are the people seated at your table, who share some of the same goals and dreams. And the realization that you’re not alone, and that others want some of the same things you do, is a form of validation in itself. And if they believe they can do it, why shouldn’t you believe in yourself as well? Positive energy is as contagious as the flu. It’s just a matter of hanging around the right people.

A weekend conference of this type is worth whatever it takes to get there. But the fact is, these things only happen every now and then. The rest of the year, your positive affirmation is largely up to you. What you feed your mind in those quiet moments will shape the results you achieve. Feed it positive, reaffirming thoughts, and that’s the output you can expect. That’s when great things happen.

It’s been said that whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. You already have the dream. So, feed your belief. Read some good books, spend some time with people who are on the go, and celebrate those small wins as they occur. With every positive step you take, you’re that much closer to your goal. And just think of all the great friends you’ll make along the way.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Sunny Days Are Made, Not Born

Good morning, and happy Hump Day! I hope your day is starting off really well.

Have you ever met one of those people who never seems to have a bad day? The person who walks into work with a smile, greeting everyone by name, telling everyone what a beautiful day it is, and they’re not even a politician? You wonder sometimes if they woke up on the same planet as everyone else, or if they’re just oblivious.

Okay, I’ll make a little confession here … I try to be that person. It doesn’t always work, and sometimes I’m suppressing how I really feel, because we all have our days when things just aren’t all glitter and puppy dogs. But I’ve found that if I keep those negative thoughts to myself, things just seem better. It’s a really old concept I learned as a teenager – fake it till you make it.

And there’s something to be said for that. We tend to believe what’s repeated, whether by ourselves or others. It’s the very basis of advertising. The more somebody tells us we need a certain product, that it’ll make our days better, our lives longer, and drive the opposite sex wild with desire, the more that message begins to wear on us. Before long, we’re out shopping for something we didn’t even know we needed.

It’s also the basis of misinformation, both intentional and unintentional. From politics to medicine, we’re constantly bombarded with “truths” somebody else wants us to know. Of course, some are much more factual than others, but when did that ever stop anybody from sharing an opinion as gospel? And, again, the more we hear the same message, the more believable it becomes.

I remember years ago, we tried an experiment in a leadership class. The instructor picked out one person in the room, and the rest of us were to convince that person that they didn’t look well. Naturally, that person had no idea what we were doing. He was just the unlucky soul who took a restroom break at the wrong time and left the rest of us to plot his demise.

When he returned, the instructor asked, “Do you feel okay? You look a little pale.” For the rest of the morning, several of us took turns doing the same thing. Or we’d point to the clouds and suggest a storm was coming or tell him we heard the company was getting ready to cancel vacations and force overtime. He didn’t even have vacation scheduled, but by lunchtime, he was visibly distressed.

Okay, it might have been fun to see how long we could ruin his day, but that wouldn’t have been very nice. Right before lunch, the instructor let him off the hook and explained how the repeated suggestion that things are not going well can change your perspective to the point that you overlook all the sun peeking through the clouds and only see a looming storm.

It’s been said that we all tend to live up to the expectations that others have set for us. Not demands, expectations. There’s a difference. A demand is something to which you’ll be held accountable. An expectation is a belief that it’ll happen simply because you’re the one in the driver’s seat. And we all tend to be a lot more successful when others genuinely expect us to succeed.

The same is true about our own perceptions. Put ten people in a room together, close the door, and walk away without saying a word. Just leave them to wonder what’s going on. Every one of those people is experiencing the same reality, but you can believe there are at least ten different ideas of what that means. At that point, they form a few expectations of their own.

And those expectations have a strong influence on our perception. While one person is waiting for the boss to walk in with a stack of pink slips, another sees little more than a chance to enjoy some quiet time among friends. And for both of them, until that door opens, and they find out what’s really going on, their perception is reality.

If you wake up in the morning expecting a gloomy day, you’re probably off to a real good start toward fulfilling that expectation. If, on the other hand, you wake up excited about the new day and look forward to it with anticipation of all the good things you can accomplish, the odds are much more in your favor.

That’s not to say nothing can come along to change your day. Storms will arise, things will go wrong, people will get upset, and some of that will try to rub off on you. But if you started the day happy and positive, it’ll take a lot more to get you down. It’s all about expectations. Set your expectations high, and you won’t have to look too hard to spot the good when it comes your way.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

The Team That Always Wins

Good morning! I hope your day is starting off well.

Last night I was supposed to meet with some good friends. It’s something I look forward to every week, part of my regular Monday routine. But part of being a friend is knowing when you probably shouldn’t share germs freely with everyone you know, especially one who’s elderly and has been having health problems of her own. So, I stayed home for the good of the group.

These folks I was supposed to see are more than just friends. They’re people with whom I share a common goal, and we help one another in that pursuit. We share ideas, we pat one anther on the back, we hug and pray together, and at the end of the night we all go back to our own world for another week, just a little more energized and ready to take on the world.

There are reasons more and more companies are so focused on the team concept. Instead of looking for a single superstar who can leap tall buildings and stop a speeding locomotive, they want people who can work together to help others accomplish their own objectives. Because, when those objectives are aligned toward a single goal, the team is pretty much bulletproof. Okay, enough of the Superman references.

I work on a diverse team, each of us with our own unique skills. Individually, we’re pretty much experts in what we bring to the table. But none of us, on our own, could come close to doing the job as quickly or as well as we do together. We each have our niche, and when you put those special skills together, they complete a picture, much like the pieces of a puzzle.

Take a look at the people you work with. You may all share similar skills, but think about all the other people who make it possible for you to shine each day. It takes everything from managers to janitors, salespeople and supply clerks, executives and administrative assistants. Unless your company’s only job is to get people to show up every day, it takes a diverse set of skills to make it all happen.

And sure, you may be so good at your job that you could probably pitch in and do somebody else’s job as well. In fact, I’d be willing to bet there are few things you couldn’t learn pretty much on the spot if you had to. Children have been known to steer a car to safety when the driver is suddenly incapacitated. We do what we have to do.

But that doesn’t mean we’re really good at it. No matter how much we can stretch our abilities to fill in when the team comes up a little short, nothing beats a group of complementary talents all firing on eight cylinders. And in a scenario like that, there are no unimportant roles. Even the newest person on the team adds value in ways they may never even realize.

There are very few things in life that we can accomplish entirely on our own. And even if we could, it probably wouldn’t be very enjoyable. And there are few things more valuable than a friend whose only payback for helping you succeed is the satisfaction of watching you succeed. Somebody who doesn’t stand to gain a thing other than knowing you’ve achieved some of your own goals.

And, for as good as it feels having friends like that, it feels even better when you are that friend. How many times in your life were you able to help somebody else achieve their goals? It feels good, doesn’t it? And sure, there may be a day when the tables will turn, and they’ll be there to help you. But that’s not why you help. You do it for one simple reason – because you’re a friend.

In this life, we are blessed to have just a few people we can truly call a friend. There will be lots of others who are there when the sun is shining, but a true friend is the one who holds your umbrella when it isn’t. Cherish those people. They are the ones who will drive you to levels of greatness you could never have achieved on your own. And you are the one who can do the same for them.

At work and in life, there’s nothing as powerful as a team working together toward a common goal. And the more each person on that team dedicates their effort to helping the others, the faster you’ll all get to where you want to be.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

When Faced With Dessert, Eat the Brussels Sprouts First

Good morning! I hope you all had a nice weekend.

It’s the start of a brand-new week, and that means a whole list of things we need to do over the next several days. More likely, it means a whole list of things we didn’t get done last week that we have to do now before we can begin this week’s work. Can I get an amen?

More and more, that seems to be the way things go. There’s never enough time to get things done in the allotted time, and our reward for all that hard work seems to be adding even more to the schedule for the following week. Whether it’s your job, things around the house, or anything else that keeps you occupied, there’s always more than enough to do.

And it’s easy to skim off the top and take on the more pleasant tasks first. After all, it is Monday. Do they really expect you to just jump right back in? Do they not understand that it takes a few hours to shift from weekend mode into work mode, and you probably need a little time to unwind from two days at home? The nerve of some people!

Well, the reality is, whatever we didn’t get done last week probably needs to be done first. And there’s probably a reason it didn’t get done to begin with … it wasn’t one of those cherry-picking skim-off-the-top tasks that you can knock out in a few minutes. If so, it would have already been done. Along with all those other less-than-challenging tasks you knocked out Friday afternoon.

It’s hard to begin a major task late in the day, especially right before the weekend, because you know there’s no way you can get it done. But, by morning, something else usually comes along that has to be done right now because the assumption is that you show up for work every morning with a clean slate. And nobody wants to set the boss straight on that one.

So, the big task that you planned to tackle first thing Monday morning sits until Monday afternoon, and then there’s no time to get it done by the end of the day, so you resolve to just get it done Tuesday. Then Tuesday comes along with its own new challenges, and guess what happens? I could probably build a big list of those Monday morning jobs that never got done. Thankfully, most are at home where I can’t get fired.

And, believe me, I was a shining example of this concept over the weekend. I’ve got enough projects at home to keep me busy for the next couple of months, and they won’t wait forever. But one thing led to another this weekend, and there wasn’t really time to get any of them completed, so I sat in front of the TV instead. Smart, huh?

We’ve talked before about tackling the most unpleasant task first. When my wife puts broccoli on my plate, I tend to eat it first so I can get it out of the way and enjoy what’s left of my meal. And there’s a reason mom never let us eat dessert first. She knew there was no way on God’s green earth we’d have eaten those Brussels sprouts later. So, we learned this concept early in life.

Most of us will face work today that we’d rather not do, and some of that will be pretty significant in terms of effort. But work has a habit of staying right where you left it. You can spin your wheels all day, or take on a dozen other tasks, but whatever you’ve been avoiding will still be there waiting. Sooner or later, you’ll have to do something about it.

As you begin your day, take a few moments to assess what’s on your plate. Make a list if you have to. And take a guess at how long each job will take. Then double that estimate, because nothing is as easy as it seems. Then take the biggest or most pressing task first and dive in. You may not get it all done today but think of how much less you’ll have to face tomorrow morning.

It’s natural to avoid the unpleasant and anything that seems insurmountable. But if we knock those things out first, the rest of the day is just that much easier. And meanwhile, it builds your own confidence. You’re not only getting things done, you’re doing the impossible. And with that kind of ability, no task (or dream) will ever be too large. You can accomplish anything!

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

The Clock is Running … What’s Your Score?

Good morning, and happy Friday! We made it through another week. I hope yours has been awesome.

This morning I have a biometric screening at work – blood test, body measurements, all those things that normally don’t start the day off well for somebody with my physique. I’ll get the results in a few days and they’ll tell me the things I’ve done well and all the things I could’ve done better. That second list will be the longer of the two. No surprises there.

It’s important to get a measure of your standing from time to time, because that’s a measure of success. If you don’t know where you are, you don’t know where you need to go. I know about things like blood pressure, weight, and body fat. I measure them regularly. But the stuff on the inside is a little more of a mystery. This is where I find out how all the outward stuff is affecting the rest.

And when I get my results, I’ll know exactly where I stand right now, and what needs to be fixed. I already know how to fix those things. But sometimes, we need to know the current score in order to prioritize what needs to be done next.

It’s the same with anything you’re trying to accomplish. Project managers draft detailed project plans to set milestones and track progress through the life of a project. Banks send those statements every month that shows our progress toward saving more than we spend. And the GPS shows our progress toward a desired destination. And mine seems to say “recalculating” a lot. Just me?

It’s important to stop occasionally and take stock of where you are, what you’ve accomplished to date, and then reassess your next step. Whether you’re cooking dinner or playing chess, progress is an important measure of what you need to do to keep moving toward your goal. And it lets you know when it’s time to take an unscheduled turn or pit stop to get things back on track.

As we talk about our dreams and goals, it’s easy to just throw them out there with a simple one-word timeline – “Someday.” It’s a goal, and we plan to do it at some point in life. But with such a vague definition of when this is all supposed to happen, it’s pretty hard to track our progress along the way.

Let’s say your goal is a European vacation for the whole family. Twelve countries in five days. I’ve never understood the fascination with breezing across borders without slowing down to enjoy the scenery, much less sample the local cuisine. But some people seem to enjoy that.

You probably have an idea of how much that will cost. In today’s dollars, that is. You save a little every month for several years, and watch it grow. Every year, you see yourself getting a little closer. Emergencies come along and set you back. The car needs repairs. Your kid needs braces. Then there’s college, a new roof on the house, and all the other things that come along.

And by the time you have everything in place and you’re ready to pack up and go, inflation has more than doubled the price. Now you’re back to square one. Maybe not all the way, but how many more years will it take to make this happen? And how many other things will come along to mess up your plans even more?

Cemeteries are the resting place of unfulfilled dreams. All those things a person never had a chance to do are buried right along with them. And after the funeral, the family decides to pool their resources and take that vacation mom always dreamed of … you know, in her honor. And the whole time they’re saying, “Mom would have loved this!” Yeah, probably so.

The time for living our dreams is now – while we’re still alive and have the chance to do something about it. But we have to put measures in place, so we know where we are and what still remains to be done. And we have to check along the way to see if the goal has moved. Destinations don’t move around much, but what it takes to get there may change dramatically along the way.

Life is full of surprises, some good and some not so good. By knowing where we’re going and how far we’ve come, those surprises turn into detours rather than roadblocks. Instead of getting to the end of life and lamenting the things we never got to do, we can bask in the memory of the things we’ve done. And memories live on, long after our dreams have been laid to rest.

Dream, set goals, and make plans. But most importantly of all, make sure you’re getting closer as you go. You only have the rest of your life. Make it count.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Exercise is a Good Thing – Taken in Moderation

Good morning! I hope you’re all having a fantastic day so far.

For the past several days, I’ve awakened to some pretty welcome news, courtesy of the bathroom scale. It seems I’m finally in the groove and what I’m doing is beginning to pay off. And yes, the batteries in the scale are fresh, thank you. All told, I’ve lost a total of 17 pounds since I started this downhill journey, and I couldn’t be happier.

I’m using a Body Key app on my phone that tracks my weight and chimes in with virtual pats on the back and helpful tips along the way. It’s designed to take you through three phases of the weight loss journey, with the ultimate goal of weaning you off the meal replacement products and sending you on your way lighter, healthier, and better equipped to continue toward your ultimate goal.

Yesterday morning, along with a message of praise for being a good boy, the app suggested now may be the time to start mixing in some exercise. Damn. It just had to go there! All this time we’ve been getting along so well, and now it wants me to intentionally put my body through stretching and pulling exercises that have the sole effect of making me smell bad. Just lovely.

I joke about that a lot, but I actually enjoy exercise. Well, I enjoy it while I’m doing it. Getting me to the gym is another matter entirely. There are just too many other things to do. Like watching TV, surfing the internet, or standing in the front door staring at absolutely nothing. I’d like to say I have a better excuse, but that’s about as good as it gets.

Part of my issue with exercise has been my lower back. The last several times I’ve started into a workout routine, it lasted about a week before I started walking around hunched over like an old man. Okay, an older man. Much older. Ten years at least. And as soon as that kicks in, my days of exercising are over for the time being. And it seems “time being” lasts a lot longer than it used to.

It’s the classic Catch-22. My back hurts because of all this extra weight I’ve been carrying around. If I want to lose an appreciable amount of weight, exercise is part of the formula. So, I nurse my back into reasonable shape and start exercising. And then I’m lucky to walk. Can I get an amen?

Well, with the loss so far, my back is beginning to feel better. Not great, but I can honestly say it’s more discomfort than pain, and as long as I can keep it at that level, exercise should be no problem. My problem is learning how to ease into something. As soon as I get back to the gym, I want to do it all. I get frustrated that my strength isn’t what it used to be, and I want that back. NOW.

It’s important to eat exercise. And it’s equally important to listen to your body along the way. A trick I’ve learned over the years is to go in one day, do a quick routine that includes one set of everything, but a little lighter on the weights, and then rest for a couple of days before I go back. That usually helps me avoid the typical first-workout muscle pain. You know, the kind that hits you two days later when you can’t do a thing about it.

From there, I can usually get back into a routine. And I guess I need to pay more attention to exercises I can do while seated, with full back support, instead of standing there swinging weights like Tarzan. Again, we have to listen to our body. What works for one person could destroy another. At this point, I’m even scared of the treadmill. So, I’ll do what I can do and hope for the best.

Weight loss is a problem, and if you’re suffering with it yourself, you’re not alone. Obesity is a national epidemic that’s spread to much of the world. Yet we are among the most mal-nourished people on the planet, thanks to processed food and junk. I’m learning that you can’t achieve sustained weight loss simply through diet or exercise – you have to give it the 1-2 punch.

And moderation is the key to success. Each day try to do just a little better than yesterday. Or maybe each week. Remember those Monday morning resolutions? Don’t try to do it all at once, because your body will revolt and then you’ll be worse off than you were. It’s not a race – it’s a marathon, long and slow. And the goal is simply to cross the finish line, no matter how long it takes. You can do this!

That’s all for now. Be healthy and have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

The Exponential Power of Kindness

Good morning, and happy Hump Day! I hope your day is starting off well.

I’ve been reading a lot on social media about showing others some kindness. It’s heartwarming to read those messages, though it’s sad that our world is in such a shape that we have to remind people to do these things. And the evening news only reinforces that perspective. There sure seems to be a lot of hate floating around.

Back in the day, I used to write humor columns every week. It was an enjoyable task, and it helped me look at life in a little more lighthearted way. There’s always something funny out there. You just have to look at things with a slightly different set of eyes. I once saw a freshly painted sign on the side of the highway that read, “Used cows for sale.” If that didn’t make you grin, we need to talk.

I got into writing humor for one simple reason – to make people smile, maybe even laugh out loud. And I ran into some resistance along the way. “Write something I can use – I don’t have time for silliness!” Well, okay. There are people who feel that way. But there are a lot more who desperately want to laugh and could use a little help.

We all have different needs. Some people need a good laugh. Others need a handshake and a smile. The person on an electric scooter in the grocery store, staring at boxes on the top shelf, could probably use a little help. That downtrodden person on the street needs a smile. A co-worker may need a pat on the back, just to let them know they’re doing a good job.

There’s a scene from my teenage years that continues to haunt me, a time when I was faced with the choice of compassion or hostility and I made the wrong choice. As a result, a younger boy was sent home in tears with the broken remains of a tabletop pinball game he’d bought from the thrift store because I was more concerned about him leaving an empty box in our front yard than helping him out.

Hopefully over the years I’ve made up for that with others, and I pray somebody else showed that boy the kindness that I should have. Think about how it makes you feel when somebody shows you some genuine compassion and humanity. Then think about how it feels when they don’t. It makes a huge difference in your day.

One simple act of kindness can go a long way toward healing what’s wrong in our world. And, to be sure, there are people who simply don’t care. Anything you do for them is received in a spirit of entitlement instead of gratitude. We can’t change people like that. But, thankfully, they’re in a class of their own, far removed from the rest of humankind. The majority of people accept kindness graciously.

When we do something kind for somebody else, even just a heartfelt gesture, it instantly changes their outlook. That change may only last a moment, but what if the person behind you does the same thing? And then the person behind them? After a while, it begins to build. And sometimes, it’s that one act of kindness from you that reminds the person behind you to do the same.

Watch people walking into the store at Christmas, brushing past the Salvation Army kettle with their eyes straight forward like they didn’t even realize somebody was there to collect donations. Then watch the people behind them do the same thing. But if just one person drops a couple of dollars in the kettle, the person behind them is that much more likely to do the same.

It’s because we all need a sense of validation. We need to know we count. And just because you’re on top of the world, thriving in your career with a warm and loving family, that doesn’t change the fact that you need to feel needed. And in letting one other person know they’re important, that they count, it validates that person’s need for the kindness you showed. It validates you.

Make time for kindness. Look for those opportunities and share them freely. It doesn’t cost a thing to share a smile or lend a hand, and a couple of dollars is everything to somebody whose pockets are empty. We’re all on this planet together, and any one of us could find ourselves in need of a little help. It all starts from within. We have the power to make it happen. Let’s do this!

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

When Life Hands You Lemons, Squash ‘Em!

Good morning! I hope your day is starting off well.

Yesterday was one of those days that could have gone either way, and it turned out to be another exercise in frustration. It happens, and especially when people with an ulterior motive decide to make sure it happens. But you know what? Today is a brand-new day.

We all have those times when things happen that shouldn’t. People get sick, people die, jobs are lost, homes are lost, friends are lost, or any of a hundred other things that leave you feeling completely hopeless. Sometimes there is no rhyme or reason, so all you can do is wake up the next day and move forward.

My mom always used to say that, once you hit rock bottom, the only way you can go is up. There’s some truth to that. And even at the worst point yesterday I was far from rock bottom. But after a few hours of sulking and just trying to make sense of the day’s events, we had dinner, exchanged some laughs, and found a renewed sense of purpose to set things right. It’s a good feeling.

And I guess a big part of the reason we were able to turn things around so quickly is because of the type of things I write about in these posts – dreams, visions of success, positivity, and the reality that our destiny is much more in our control than it sometimes appears. It may feel like we’re only along for the ride, but the steering wheel is very much up for grabs. You can take it any time you want.

Happiness and positivity are a frame of mind. We can choose to be happy (generally) or choose to be downtrodden. It’s all in how we view the little things around us each day. Walking outside to cold air and gray clouds isn’t what most of us would call a good start to the day. But we can either moan about it all the way to work or turn up the radio and sing along. It’s a choice we can make.

Much of life is about perspective. You can drive past a dilapidated home on a dirt road with rusted out cars in the yard, people sitting on the porch commiserating about their lot in life, and in the yard you’ll see young children running and playing without a care in the world. They all live in the same reality – they just see it differently.

And part of that is just age. When we’re young, our parents try to shield us from the negative factors in life, especially those we can’t control like money and bills. But there’s nothing sweeter than the smile on a child’s face as they invent new games to play, laughing and singing without a care in the world.

I have little doubt I’ll step outside to less than ideal weather. Somebody in traffic will try to put me in a bad mood, and something at work will go wrong. These things happen. And, to be fair, when enough of them happen all in the same day, it can pretty much wreak havoc on your general mood. But it’s our ability to handle those little things that makes us better able to handle the big ones.

If we allow the little things to get to us, there’s no way we can handle life’s real challenges. Our family suffered a blow yesterday, one that came as the result of somebody else’s misdeeds. It happens. But we were able to quickly shake it off and get back on mission. And I know it’s because we’re generally positive and hopeful.

Positivity, like many other things, is simply a habit. It’s a choice you make at some point that becomes a part of who you are. It kicks in automatically all through the day, and when you need it the most, it’s there to help you face challenges with a clear mind and the knowledge that you can rise above. It’s what makes the difference between happiness and despair.

So, as you go through the day, pay attention to the little things that bother you. Don’t dwell on them, just be aware of their existence. Then find something positive about the situation and focus on that. It only takes a few seconds to change your perspective. Then you can face the challenge with a renewed sense of spirit. Do that often enough, and it becomes a habit.

Buildings are raised a brick at a time, beginning with a strong foundation you can’t even see once it’s been covered. But it’s there, supporting the whole structure when the storm clouds blow in. Build that foundation within yourself – a foundation of positivity – and you’ll find there isn’t much in life you can’t handle. Each day is only as good as you choose to let it be. Make it count.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

The Greatest Wisdom Comes From Being Wrong

Good morning! I hope you all had a nice weekend.

So, did you do anything fun over the weekend? That’s the common question we ask people as we greet them on a Monday. Half the time we just want to get the formalities out of the way so we can brag on our own adventures, and other times we just really want to hear that somebody else’s weekend was better than our own. I’ll take a seat in the second row today. It happens.

It wasn’t a bad weekend. But for all the talk about relaxing and decompressing, I did pretty much the exact opposite. Sometimes we go into these things with the best of intentions, but life has a way of changing our plans. So, you work your way through and move on.

Today will be a big day for our family – one that could turn out very well or send us back to a home that just feels empty. And there’s really not much we can do but speak the truth and hope that, for once, it matters. I’m finding that, in even the best system of justice, egos and personal whims are still very much a factor, and they do influence decisions. And it’s always the children who pay the price.

I’ve always been the kind of person who likes to at least enjoy the illusion of being in control. And I guess I should explain that statement. There is, after all, a difference between controlling and being in control. To me, being in control means keeping my thoughts and emotions in check, analyzing each situation, and responding in a way that leads to a positive outcome. It comes from within.

And it’s hard to face a situation where it’s likely I’ll come home with nothing more than the knowledge that I stood for what is right. I’m learning that justice isn’t always about finding the truth, but extracting only those elements of evidence that support preconceived opinions. It’s human nature to seek validation of our own beliefs.

This isn’t the first time I’ve found myself in a similar situation, and I’m sure it won’t be the last. It happens to all of us. People form an opinion, usually with only a small piece of the puzzle, and once that opinion is formed, it’s hard to change their mind. And you think, “If only they’d take a minute to look at the whole picture, they’d understand.” Truer words have never been spoken.

So, how do we react when we’re on the other side of that equation, when we’re the one who formed a quick opinion and just can’t seem to let it go? Your kid brings home a friend dressed in gothic attire, looking like a zombie. Your initial assessment may not be entirely positive. But how hard does that kid have to work to convince you they’re not a criminal in the making?

If we’re honest, the answer isn’t always what we’d like to hear. It’s one thing to convince another person they’re wrong, but doing it to yourself requires a personal attack on your own beliefs. That’s not an easy pill to swallow. And, too often, other people are hurt by our own inner reluctance to accepting another possibility.

I read a quote years ago that I’ve repeated many times in my life. “A mind is like a parachute – it only works when it’s open.” I believe those are among the most insightful words ever spoken, and they came from the mind of none other than Frank Zappa. Think of how much better we’d all get through life if we kept that thought in mind more often.

Nobody likes being wrong. And nobody likes being on the receiving end of wrong. As I begin my day, I have three simple prayers. First, that the decision-makers we will face can approach the day with an open mind, mindful of the reality that first impressions don’t always paint a complete picture. Second, that I can do the same, today and every day for the remainder of my life.

And finally, I pray that each of you are able to set aside any pre-conceived opinions that are holding you back, standing in the way of relationships, or blocking out the most important part of a picture you’d be thrilled to behold. If you never let your mind be completely closed, it’s that much easier to keep it open. Take care of your parachute. You never know when your life may depend on it.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved