Dave Glardon

One Degree at a Time

January 9, 2019January 9, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Mark Twain once said everybody always complains about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. I guess it’s good that we can’t actually do anything about it, because that would just give us all one more thing to fight over. And I’m pretty sure I’d never live long enough to get my turn at the thermostat. If I did, I’d set it to 80 and break it.

My wife and I have a running feud over the inside temperature of our house. Well, it’s more like a disagreement. Okay, it’s a game of cat & mouse. She keeps turning it down, then I sneak down the hallway to turn it back up. We’ve done this several times a day for the past five years. We both think the other won’t notice, or maybe we just hope we’ll get at least an hour or two of relative comfort.

And, are you ready for this? Our difference in the definition of “acceptable” is one degree. One. Singular. You can’t even measure it in degrees, because there’s only one of them. Seriously? In fairness, that’s just the temperature where we’ve agreed not to compromise. She would be happy with five degrees colder, and I’d be happy on a tropical beach.

Now, there’s no way our bodies can tell the difference between 68 and 69 degrees. But that’s where we’ve drawn the line. At this point, it’s more of a moral victory than anything really meaningful. Yet, we play the game. Day after day, year after year. I can’t wait to see what we’ll be like in our eighties.

I guess this is a (somewhat) amusing way of illustrating a more important point. It’s natural to want to live in our comfort zone and, for most of us, stepping outside that comfort zone is a big deal. Even if it’s only by one degree. We know where life feels good, and that’s where we want to stay.

But all too often, what we perceive as our comfort zone really isn’t that comfortable at all. We just live our lives in a state of compromise and acceptance, never really trying to make it any better. Because, in the very act of making it better, we have to abandon what we’ve come to know and take a chance on breaking the thermostat completely.

And, it’s that risk that keeps most of us right where we are. That, and a feeling of relative comfort. Sure, you’d like to make more money, or live in a bigger house, or get a better job, or break away from a toxic relationship. But that means stepping away from what you’ve come to know and into the unknown. It means change, and change isn’t something we always handle very well.

So, we sit right where we are, in a state of relative discomfort, simply because it’s easier than making the changes that would increase our level of comfort. After a while, we even embrace that level of discomfort, because it’s what we know. This is the very reason the vast majority of lottery winners are bankrupt within a few years. The change is just too sudden.

But, here’s the thing. The temperature in our house didn’t suddenly change one day from 75 degrees to 68. It was a slow progression – a trick wives learn in bridal school where they teach them to conquer the household one degree at a time. And husbands, gullible as we are, don’t even notice it until there are icicles on the bathroom mirror. By then, we’ve been had.

The same is true of changes in your life. The big bang approach usually doesn’t work, because it’s too much change too fast. Why do you think all those New Year’s resolutions fail? But if we approach change a little at a time and give ourselves a little time to get used to the change, it adjusts our comfort zone and becomes another normal part of our day.

Your comfort zone is like a rubber band. It can sit there for years, never doing anything besides just existing and getting moved from one place to another. But in order to be of any value at all, it has to be stretched. And, the reality is, someday you’ll stretch it too far and it’ll break. So, you reach into the drawer and get a new one that you can stretch even further.

One degree at a time. It may not fix the ongoing battle over the temperature in our home, but it can make a huge difference in your quality of life if you’ll just let go of that one degree that’s holding you back. You can’t find a new comfort zone by resting comfortably in the one you’ve got. Step outside and explore. You never know what you may find.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

You Won’t Do What???

January 8, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Have you ever awakened in the morning with a song going through your head – a song you haven’t heard in months or maybe even years, and one you may not even like? Of course, you have. It happens to all of us. We have no idea why that song popped into our head and, try as we might, we can’t shake it until something else comes along to take its place.

If you enjoy any of the music from the early 90s, you’re probably familiar with these lyrics: “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.” The song was first recorded in 1993 by Michael Aday, better known to most of us as Meat Loaf, and it reached the #1 spot on the charts in 28 countries.

That’s the song I woke up with this morning, and it’s still playing through my head. Thankfully, this is one I really liked. Yesterday I woke up to Janis Joplin. I’m sure for some of you, that would have been a great way to start the day. I’m pretty sure it was my brain’s way of punishing me for going to bed so late.

So, why am I writing about that this morning? Well, two reasons. First, it’s a vivid reminder of the fact that our brain can retain just about anything for a long, long time, and it can bring it back to the surface when we least expect it. Good things and bad, so be careful what goes in.

But in the context of motivation and success, I think it raises a pretty important point. We all want the best life has to offer, but we tend to draw a lot of lines when it comes time to actually do something about it. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. We should have limits, especially when it comes to something that is completely against our values.

Still, that leaves a lot on the table. We all have things we want, dreams that we can describe in vivid detail. And, while we’re in the dream mode, our imagination can become the world’s best add-on salesman. “You want the tour package to go with that? How about a luxury suite? And you wouldn’t want to travel this far in a coach seat … we’re talking first class, right?” And your brain says, “YES!!!”

Okay, so what happens when it’s time to start working toward that dream? That’s when the song starts playing: “I would do anything for (insert your favorite dream here) … but I won’t do THAT.” Really? A moment ago, you were adding options like a kid at the ice cream buffet. No extravagance is too great. After all, you deserve this. You’ve earned it!

“But you mean I actually have to work for it???” The list of options hits the floor and is quickly replaced by an even bigger list of limits. Okay, you’ll work for it. Maybe even a little extra. As long as it’s not too much extra effort, and it doesn’t cut into bowling night. And it can’t be anything that involves sales or talking to strangers. After all, you still have a little pride!

Try something, just for fun. At the top of a sheet of paper, write down one of your biggest dreams. Don’t hold back – let’s go for the gold. Immediately below that, write down all the reasons you want this. Then, draw a line across the page and begin listing all the things you’re not willing to do to get it. You can leave off the illegal and immoral things – you won’t need them.

If you’re being completely honest, you can describe your dream and all the reasons you want it in the top half of the page. But you’ll probably need several sheets of paper to finish the list of things you won’t do to get it. “I would do anything for (top of the page), but I won’t do that (the rest).” It’s a real eye-opener.

In talking with people about their dreams, I find this to be the case more often than not. The “I won’t do that” list can be pretty long and, after a while, even they begin to realize they’re not even describing personal values or hard limits. It’s just a convenient list of excuses. “I could have had that if I wanted it, but I wasn’t willing to do THAT.”

If your dreams are important enough, you’ll find a way. It’s there – you just have to set aside your inhibitions (and maybe even a little pride) and make it happen. Make excuses or make memories. That’s the bottom line. Take an eraser to your “I won’t do that” list and you’ll open a world of possibilities. From there, all you have to do is pick one and let the magic begin.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

Dust Off Your Dreams

January 7, 2019January 7, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Monday isn’t a day we tend to celebrate. The weekend is over and, for most of us, it’s back to work. The boss thinks you should be completely rested and ready to hit the ground running. But those of us who have actually met the reality fairy know better. We know that Monday morning is when we suffer the hangover from trying to cram a week’s worth of activity into two days.

On the other hand, the kids are back in school, so there’s that. Sometimes, you have to find the good in any situation. As a parent who raised two teenage girls, I know the feeling well. The only problem is, the teacher gets tired of them before the boss gets tired of us. Why haven’t schools ever learned the concept of overtime?

Monday is also the first day of a whole new week of opportunities. It’s a chance to either pick up where you left off last week in your pursuit of a personal goal, or to begin working on something entirely new. And, regardless of how much rest you actually got over the weekend, your brain is rejuvenated and ready. If only you could get your body to catch up.

Last week, I suggested Monday resolutions. Did you give it a try? How did it go? If you’re like most of us, you did well some days, and spent the rest of the week nursing the bruises from falling off the wagon. That’s okay. Once you get to be my age, the problem isn’t sticking with a resolution. It’s remembering what you decided to do in the first place.

Luckily, God saw that coming and invented something to help us through those times. It’s called paper. Things that are clear in your mind today tend to become a little cloudy over time, especially when they’re not front and center every day. But words on paper never change. The same goes for words on a computer. How many politicians found that out the hard way?

Besides refreshing our memory about exactly what we decided to do, written goals serve as a constant reminder that we’re probably not taking the right steps to achieve that goal. Okay, for some people it’s another box to check off right before they reach around and pat themselves on the back. If you’re one of those, more power to you. The rest of us need a little help.

And, here’s the thing … when you put those goals in writing, don’t hide them in the bottom of a desk drawer where you’ll never see them again. Leave them out, in plain sight, where you’re sure to see them every day. Who cares if somebody else sees it? They may end up giving you the moral support you need to see it through. You know, right after they get up off the floor from laughing.

But, here’s an important thing to remember. If your goals wouldn’t make anybody else at least smile in that “you really are delusional” kind of way, you’re not trying hard enough. It needs to be something a little bigger than tying your shoes each morning. Stretch your imagination. Think big. At least tie them in a double knot.

When we keep our goals front and center, it’s that much harder for life to push them off to the side. Roadblocks become speed bumps or, at the very worst, the beginning of a detour that will eventually put us right back on track. And, along the way, we just might make a few new friends or find something worth coming back to check out.

It’s hard to focus on personal goals when demands of the job kick in, or when you’re in the middle of trying to handle any of life’s other priorities. But, the more you can keep that goal in front of you, the more cemented it becomes in your mind. It’s not there to remind everyone else – it’s there to remind you.

Get some pictures of what you want most and put them up where you can see them several times a day. Put one on the refrigerator. If you’re like me, you’ll see that one at least a couple of times. Put extras anywhere else you spend a fair amount of time.

And, if somebody else sees them, that’s even better. Well, within the constraints of Human Resources policy. Early retirement is a worthy goal, but let’s not force the issue. Still, when people ask about your picture, that’s a chance to reaffirm your goal. “That’s a picture of our next vacation.” Unless they have access to your bank book, they’ll never know the difference.

Goals are like any other priority in life. Unless we keep them dusted off, they can lose their luster really fast. And, much like that prized centerpiece on the living room table, the more prominently you keep it on display, the more likely you are to keep it shined up. So, keep your dreams visible. And be sure to spend a little time admiring them. They are, after all, some of your most prized possessions.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

Change is Not a Four-Letter Word

January 4, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

We’re all creatures of habit. Some a little more than others, but we all get into a comfort zone and tend to stay there until something comes along to change that. Those habits could be anything from which side of the bed we sleep on to which shoe we put on first, the route we follow driving to work, and how we spend our first five minutes on the job each day.

Most of our habits are completely inconsequential. Does it matter where you sit in church, or which shoe goes on first? Not a bit. In fact, some experts suggest we should change those habits from time to time, just to break up the monotony.

Beyond that, I think it can help us learn to adapt to change, so the thought of changing a habit isn’t quite so daunting. Because, let’s face it, we tend to make a big production of changing our habits. We make resolutions, set dates, create checklists, and put stars on our daily calendar like a kindergarten teacher to show the days we were “good.”

It’s no wonder we’re so reluctant to change. And if it’s that hard to change something relatively minor, how on earth can we tackle the changes that really matter, things like giving up smoking, losing weight, following an exercise program, or devoting a little time each day to building a business? All of these things can have a profound impact on our lives. And the stronger the impact, the more we resist making the change.

I think two things hold us back. The first is comfort. It’s human nature to seek a place of comfort. And when things are going well, and nothing is forcing us to change, it’s easy to sit back and say, “This isn’t so bad. I’ve done it this way all these years, and I’m still alive. In fact, I kind of enjoy how things are going right now. Why rock the boat?”

That’s great if you want to stay right where you are until the reaper pays a visit. But if you want to step things up a notch, something has to change. To have something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done. That’s one of my favorite quotes, and it resonates perfectly in this context.

The first step in making that change is to get a little uncomfortable. If we’re cruising along with little or no discomfort, there’s little incentive to change. We know what we really should do, but the urgency just isn’t there. Until the mortgage company calls and says pay up or pack up. I hope none of you ever have to experience that, but I think we can all agree, it would light a fire.

Beyond that, we need to break these major changes down into smaller bite-size pieces. One of my goals for the year is to finalize my financial situation in preparation for retirement. If you could see my bank and 401k statements today, you’d know that’s a huge undertaking. And, I’ll be honest – looking at the end goal, it’s really hard to visualize.

But, if I break it down into smaller goals – paying down the credit cards, shedding some unnecessary expenses, and building some sources of ongoing income, it becomes a little more realistic. And if I take any one of those goals and break it down even further, I can come up with a list of actionable items that can be accomplished in a relatively short amount of time.

It’s all about habits. Form the right habits, and you’ll work toward your goal without really thinking about it. It becomes second-nature. And once that habit is firmly in place, you can start working on the next one. Instead of trying to leap-frog right to your ultimate goal, you do it 21 days at a time.

If there’s something you’d like to change, a habit you’d like to develop (or break), it only takes three weeks. You may or may not reach your big goal by the end of the year, but think of how much closer you’ll be. All it takes it to get a little uncomfortable with the status quo, make a decision to do something about it, then commit to doing that for the next three weeks.

It’s been said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing, day after day, and expecting different results. To have something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done. Embrace change, one little step at a time, and there’s nothing you can’t accomplish. That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

Lose the Weight – Keep Your Health

January 3, 2019January 3, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Back when I began this thing, I decided that every now and then, I’d take a day to focus on health. Okay, judging by the size of my belly, maybe I need to do that more often. But in any discussion about dreams, success, and happiness, it’s important that we pay attention to our health.

It seems every day, somebody has come up with a new diet that promises to magically melt away the pounds. Well, there’s a problem with that. Whatever magically melts away can magically reappear, and it usually does. Don’t believe me? Just kiss somebody with an intestinal virus. You’ll lose up to ten pounds overnight. But it’ll all be back by Tuesday.

And so it goes with most of these fad diets, especially the ones that shut out one entire food group and focus on another. I once worked with a guy who lost a fair amount of weight by eating cereal three times a day. Granted, I would love to have his willpower. But I have to wonder how long that lasted, and what happened when he switched back to real food.

You see, the problem isn’t just what we’re eating. Well, it is, but hear me out. You can pour special oil additives into a dying car engine and it’ll stop making noise. But until you fix the underlying problem, it’ll just keep getting worse until one day it quits altogether.

We’re not all that different. If the underlying problem is something that causes us to overeat, or to binge on things our body doesn’t need, we’re destined for recurring weight and health problems. There’s no getting around it. The only way to fix the symptom is to fix the underlying problem.

Well, the diet promoters have that one covered as well. “You’ll get used to it, and when you do, you’ll never miss all that other stuff you were eating. In fact, it’ll make you feel nauseated if you do eat it. Stick with this and you’ll live happily ever after!”

Maybe, but that doesn’t automatically make it healthy. You can get used to anything, for a while. But sooner or later, you’ll decide you can start adding some things back in. And when you do, what happens? All those empty fat cells that your body has been storing since the diet began will grab up everything they can hold. Because fat cells, once they’re created, never go away.

Another thing to consider is the effect of the diet on your health. Our bodies were designed to consume and process a wide variety of foods, and they function best when those foods are present in ideal combinations. Cut out an entire set of nutrients, or focus too heavily on another, and your body can’t get the optimal benefit from the rest.

For instance, we all know that Vitamin D helps with the absorption of calcium. You can eat all the calcium-rich foods you want, but if you cut out your body’s primary sources of Vitamin D, you won’t be able to properly absorb the calcium.

On the other hand, phosphorus – the kind that’s found in wheat bran – inhibits the absorption of calcium. Now, everybody knows wheat bran is good for you. In fact, some diets are almost exclusively based on fiber. But we all know what happens when your body doesn’t get enough calcium. So, what’s a person to do?

Eat sensibly. It’s really that simple. Figure out what’s making you eat too much and correct the problem. When you feel tempted to snack (or gorge), get up and do something. Take a walk. Read a book. Get outside and play with the kids. More often than not, overeating is simply the result of boredom.

And when you do eat, make sure you’re getting some nutritional benefit from the food you consume. It goes without saying that most, if not all, fast foods are nutritionally deficient. They’re also loaded with sodium and fat. And you know what? The same is true of most restaurant foods. The only difference is they cost a lot more.

We live in a fast-paced world where it’s increasingly difficult to eat healthy. But neglecting your body’s overall nutritional needs for the sake of weight loss isn’t the answer. Before you launch into any diet, ask your doctor if it’s right for you. Read some independent studies. And if you do decide to give up certain foods, consider supplements to replace the nutrients your body still needs.

Bottom line – you can cheat your body for a little while, and you may even see some amazing visible benefits along the way. But it’s what you can’t see that can really mess up your day. Weight gain is a symptom, not a problem. So, fix the problem. Do that, and you can continue to eat the variety of foods your body needs without any of the negative effects.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

What is Your “Why”?

January 2, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Well, the holidays are over and it’s back to the grind. This is the time when we reflect on good times shared with family and friends, and face (for most of us) the longest stretch of the year before our next paid holiday. And if you live in the northern hemisphere, you get to contend with winter at the same time. And the hits just keep on coming!

It’s easy to get wrapped up in the post-holiday blues. The celebrations are over, the decorations are put away, and we’re expected to pick up right where left off, full speed ahead. Meanwhile, the credit card bills are coming in and we’re trying to figure out how to stretch what little is left in our checking account to cover expenses for the next month.

That said, it’s also a time of renewal. It’s a time to get back on our feet, shake off any lingering baggage from the previous year, and move forward with a sense of purpose. Whether you made a resolution for the whole year, or just for one week as I suggested in Monday’s post, this is where the rubber meets the pavement.

Like many of you, I need to lose weight. Okay, I need to lose a pretty fair amount of weight. I’m a member at a local gym and, over the past few years, I’ve exercised pretty regularly. That is to say, I’ve gone through periods of a few months where I exercised almost daily, and then several more months where I didn’t go at all. It happens.

But in my time at the gym, there’s something I’ve noticed. Every year, starting in the first week of January, the gym is full of fresh faces, people I’ve never seen there before. The morning workout crowd is about three times its normal size for a month or two, and then all those new faces are gone.

And there’s a simple reason for this. It’s not a lack of willpower, or failed resolutions, or anything of the sort. It’s simply the natural result of working toward a goal without a firm understanding of why you’re doing it in the first place.

It’s easy to set goals, and probably just as easy to start working toward them. But if we don’t know the real reason why, it won’t last very long. Ask somebody why they’re in the gym, and they can offer a bunch of superficial reasons. “To lose weight.” “To get healthy.” “To get my doctor off my back.” But those are goals – they don’t explain why.

This time of year, another common goal is paying off some bills. That may mean anything from cutting monthly expenses like cable TV or dinners out, to taking on a part-time job or even starting a business. And the goal is simple – we need more money, so we can pay off some bills. But why?

Maybe the goal is to pay down the credit cards, so we can spend more next Christmas. Maybe we want to save a down-payment for a new house or car. Maybe we want extra money for vacations or to send the kids to college. And maybe we just want a safety net, so we can start saving for retirement.

Whatever the reason, it’s important to understand what it means to you. Losing weight isn’t a reason – it’s a goal. Why do you want to lose weight? To get off your blood pressure medicine? To look more attractive? To fit into the seat of your favorite rollercoaster? It could be that simple.

Root cause analysis is a method of identifying a problem by continually asking the question “why?” The plane crashed. Why? Because it fell out of the sky. Why? Because the engine stopped. Why? Because it ran out of fuel. Why? Because it was raining, and the pilot didn’t want to risk getting water in the tanks by doing a visual inspection. Ah, now we’re getting somewhere.

Sometimes, you have to follow the same process to get to the real reason why you want to make a change. And once you’ve got that bottom-line reason firmly planted in your mind, the excuses seem to melt away. You wake up every day with a solid vision of what you’re doing, and why. It’s what drives you to succeed when you’d rather take a break.

We’ll talk more about this later, but for now, take some time to get your “why” firmly planted in your mind. It may take some time, and a few sheets of paper. But it’s worth the effort, because when you combine a goal with belief and a firm understanding of why, nothing can stand in your way.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

Dreams for the New Year

January 1, 2019January 1, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Happy New Year! I hope your day is off to a great start.

It’s hard to believe 2019 is here. My daughter shared a post this morning with a warning from a popular computer retailer 19 years ago, advising us to shut off our computers before midnight. As the world watched in anticipation of all the bad things that could possibly go wrong because of the Y2K issue, the new millennium came in without a hitch.

Throughout history, there have been times when we expected the worst. Religious devotees have predicted the end of the world, right down to the date and hour. Outbreaks of deadly viruses have sparked fears of a global pandemic. The entire Cold War was based on the very realistic threat of a massive nuclear war. And the Y2K issue predicted the simultaneous crash of every computer-driven system on the planet.

Yet here we are, alive and kicking, and launching into a brand-new year. Go figure.

Could any of those things have gone wrong? Absolutely. But they didn’t. And that was largely due to preparation and intervention. On any given day, there are things in our world that can bring us to our knees if we’re not careful. And it’s good to be aware of those potential disasters, so we can do our best to avoid them.

That said, it’s easy to get so wrapped up in these things that we miss the beauty of living. In the movie “Blast from the Past”, a family retreated into their private fallout shelter at the height of the Cuban missile crisis and remained there for the next 35 years. Their son, born in the shelter, had no exposure to anything known of the outside world beyond the year 1962.

Okay, so that’s Hollywood, and it made for an entertaining, though improbable, scenario. But how many people do you know who spend their life hiding from a perceived danger, waiting for the hammer to fall? Some are a lot more afflicted by this mindset than others, literally refusing to leave the house for fear of disaster. Others spend their days out in the world, where they can spread the effects of their pessimism among the rest of us.

It’s difficult to accurately estimate the number of optimists and pessimists in the world, mostly because it’s not something that can be scientifically diagnosed. Hundreds of polls and surveys have been conducted, but let’s be real – how many people would actually describe themselves as a pessimist? But, if you talk to people long enough, you’ll figure out who’s who.

And, make no mistake – a little dose of pessimism can be healthy in a world where things can and do go wrong. We need to be aware of the dangers around us and understand the potential impact. But, like fresh cayenne pepper, a little pessimism goes a long way.

As we begin a new year, it’s important that we look ahead with hope, and the knowledge that we can make a difference in our world. It’s important to identify those things that have been holding us back and do whatever is necessary to overcome them. It’s a time to put the past behind and move forward.

It’s also a time to dust off those dreams and pick one or two for the coming year. Not to dream about, but to accomplish. And, here’s something to think about – if all of your dreams can be accomplished in a single year, you’re not dreaming big enough. Try harder. We should all be working toward at least one goal that will carry us into the following year and beyond.

Take a few moments over the coming days to feed those dreams. Drive through a section of town where property values are on another planet. Go to an open house in a neighborhood where you’d like to live. Visit an RV or boat show. Have a family dream night with the kids. Buy a travel magazine or go to the library and check out a book on your dream destination.

If we only focus on that little part of this planet and this life that fills our own reality, we’ll completely miss all the wonderful things that are waiting to be discovered. We can sit in our own self-imposed fallout shelter for the next 35 years or get out and enjoy what’s right outside that imaginary steel door.

There are people for whom the things we think are beyond reach are part of their everyday reality. They’re no smarter than you are, and they’re no more deserving. They just got there first. Dare to dream. Allow yourself to believe. Then get up off the couch and make it happen. Dreams really do come true, but only if we make them. Let 2019 be your year.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

Harness the Habit of Success

December 31, 2018January 1, 2019 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

It’s New Year’s Eve, and we all know what that means. Okay, forty years ago it meant something entirely different, beginning with a trip to the liquor store. From there, it was a party (or a series of parties) until the ball drops at midnight ringing in the new year, along with the obligatory kissing of every young lady in the room. Granted, there was nothing “obligatory” about that.

New Year’s Eve is also a time of reflection and resolutions. We reflect on all the things we messed up in the previous year and resolve to make changes in the new year. Just one more night of overeating and debauchery, and tomorrow morning we’re getting serious about this stuff! As soon as the hangover is gone.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions. It’s just too easy to lay out grand plans for the coming year, and even easier still to take a week or two off from those goals when you have the whole year to get them done. “I’ll stop smoking this year!” That’s a worthy goal. But it gives you a whole year to get it done, so if you’re still smoking in December, you haven’t really failed because you still have a month to go.

I read an article last week that said, according to a 2017 Marist poll, about a third of people who make a New Year’s resolution fail to stick with it. You know what that means. Most of the remaining two-thirds lied about it, or their only resolution was to continue breathing for the next year. Based on my own observations, the overwhelming majority of resolutions go unfulfilled.

The article went on to suggest something more meaningful and more likely to succeed. Instead of making New Year’s resolutions that give you a whole year to get it right, make Monday resolutions. Do it every week. If you succeed for the week, you’ve got something to celebrate. If you fall off the wagon, you get to start over in just a few days. Every year, you get 52 chances to get it right.

I think the article was spot-on, with one exception. When you know in the back of your mind that you can always start over next week, there’s no sense of urgency. If you mess up this week, it’s no big deal, right? You might as well have said, “This week I’ll give some thought to making a change, but if it’s too hard or inconvenient, I’ll just push it off to next week. Or the week after. No big deal.” That’s not commitment – it’s not even wishful thinking. It’s just words.

Try this instead. The first Monday (today), you commit to making a change. You have seven days to make that change. Then, every Monday after that, you commit to continuing what you’ve started. Instead of giving yourself a stack of “get out of jail free” cards at the beginning of the year, you build on the previous week’s success and keep moving in the right direction until you reach your goal.

This all ties in with a concept I’ve talked about a lot in the past – the habit of success. When you succeed at anything, even something small, you prove to yourself that you have the ability to succeed. The more you succeed at small goals, the easier it is to see yourself succeeding at bigger and better things. Do that often enough, and success becomes inevitable. Not likely – inevitable.

So, if you want to make a resolution for the year, try this … “I will start the year with a goal for the next seven days. Then, every Monday for the rest of the year, I will repeat that resolution for the coming week. I’ll succeed in small steps instead of one giant leap. And I’ll continue taking those small steps every week until I reach my ultimate goal.”

You can build a habit of success just as easily as you built a habit of tying your shoes in the morning. It’s all about setting small, achievable goals, and then accomplishing them. Do that over and over, and before you know it, you’ll become one of “those” people … the kind who, no matter what you try, you just can’t seem to lose. Let this be your year. Let this be your week. And let it all start today.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day and a happy, healthy, and success-filled New Year!

© 2018 Dave Glardon

Wishbones and Backbones

December 19, 2018December 19, 2018 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a nice start.

Yesterday, I was reading a post where the writer quoted a long list of things we should teach our sons. I agreed with just about every one of them, because I’ve always believed we need to do a better job of passing strong values on to our kids.

One particular item on the list stood out, because of its sheer simplicity. “Don’t grow a wishbone where the backbone is supposed to go.” I did a little research and found that this quote originated from a writer named Clementine Paddleford, and it was written for daughters, not sons. “Never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.”

It’s not uncommon for sentiments such as this to be misquoted, or even re-directed. Still, I think the message remains strong, whether we’re talking about sons, daughters, or even ourselves. But, like many other such quotes, it’s easy to take it out of context and miss the meaning entirely.

“Don’t grow a wishbone.” Those four words, taken by themselves, have some pretty strong implications that fly in the face of what I’ve been promoting all this time. I talk about the importance of dreaming, and how it drives us to bigger and better things. And the closing words, “where the backbone ought to be,” could be misinterpreted as well. It would be easy to read this entire statement as, “Don’t dream of the things you want – stand up and demand them!”

And, to be honest, there are people in this world who live by that mantra. If you want something, take it. To the victor go the spoils, and everybody else can just live with their loss or grow a backbone of their own. We’ve all met people like this.

And, the problem with that line of thinking is that it assumes every gain in life must be balanced by a corresponding loss. I’ve been in business a few different times, and something I’ve never understood is the concept of a balance sheet. I guess for accountants, it’s pretty simple. But the notion that assets and liabilities must always balance out to a sum total of $0 is beyond my comprehension.

I read another post this morning, in a comedy forum of all places, that said “A rising tide raises all boats.” Now, there’s something I can understand. And, we’ve talked about this before – the concept that, by elevating those around us, we elevate ourselves as well. When the collective total increases, so does the individual average.

In accounting, balance sheets make sense (I guess). But in life, dreams are not a limited resource, nor are the things that enable our dreams. Money is a renewable resource. So are fancy homes, boats, airplanes, RVs, vacation packages, and just about anything else you can imagine. Winning yours doesn’t mean somebody else has to lose. There’s more than enough to go around.

So, let’s assume Ms. Paddleford wasn’t suggesting we don’t dream, or that we should “grow a backbone” and take what we want. I think the statement goes much deeper than that. To me, it says don’t let your ability to dream overcome your will to achieve. If there’s something you want in life, and you want it badly enough to wish for it, then have the guts to pursue that dream.

In terms of dreams, having a backbone means standing in the face of adversity and saying, “You can make things tough on me, but you can’t make me quit. I’ll stand against you day after day until you give up or just move on to somebody else, because I have already decided this shall be, and there’s no turning back. So, give it your best shot. I’ve got this.”

I doubt you can point to very many things in life that you achieved without any resistance whatsoever. Okay, people who have won the lottery may not agree, but that aside, just about every worthwhile thing you’ve accomplished in life came with some challenges. But determination and commitment carried you to the goal. Simply stated – you didn’t quit.

Should we grow a wishbone? Absolutely! And, unlike the one that comes with our Thanksgiving turkey, we need to make sure our own wishbone isn’t quite so brittle. It needs to be strong and resilient, something that can be bent, but never broken.

And that, my friends, takes commitment. It takes an unwavering belief in our ability to reach the goal, and a determination that nothing will stand in our way. Starting to sound a little like a backbone? I like the way you think!

A wishbone by itself can’t accomplish anything except pipe dreams. A backbone by itself can’t accomplish anything except standing in the way. But when you make the two work together, there’s nothing you can’t do, no goal you can’t achieve. At that point, the world is your playground, just waiting for you to enjoy whatever your heart desires.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

Make it Happen!

December 18, 2018December 18, 2018 by Dave Glardon, posted in Uncategorized

Today will be a big day for me. This afternoon I have an appointment with my surgeon’s office to get the remaining 18 staples removed from my head. As much as I’m looking forward to having them gone for good, I know I won’t be a happy camper while they’re doing it. The bandages from surgery were stapled to my head and, as you can imagine, they don’t feel very good coming out.

During this visit, I may find out how much longer I have to stay home before I can get back to work. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, there’s a reason they call this recovery. It takes time to bounce back, but I’m getting stronger by the day and I’m looking forward to getting back to “normal.”

Meanwhile, later this morning I’m having another hearing test and will likely be fitted for hearing aids. As most of you will recall, this is how the whole surgical ordeal started. In yesterday’s post, I talked about the whole concept of making plans and then adapting on the fly. Who would’ve ever guessed a hearing test would lead to brain surgery? You play the hand you’re dealt.

It’s times like this that really put things in perspective. All those little things that have bugged me through the year, all those times I complained about things I’ll forget by this time next year, no longer had any significance in the big picture. As I looked at my family and the woman who’s been at my side for the past 40 years, I realized how lucky I am, and how badly I’ve wasted those blessings by not treasuring them more than I have.

It also made me think of dreams I’ve had over the years, things I’ve put on hold because the timing just wasn’t right, or the circumstances weren’t just perfect. I adopted a very familiar mantra … “As soon as …” became an integral part of every conversation about taking that next step.

But, in waiting for everything to be just right, I’m still right where I was twenty years ago. Okay, I’ve taken a few steps, but not nearly enough to make a difference. That goal is still out there. It hasn’t moved a bit. But the math is pretty simple … unless I pick up the pace, I don’t have enough years left to get there.

I remember years ago when I was talking to my doctor about losing weight. He said to aim for one pound a week. And I remember thinking, “At that rate, it’ll take two years!” (You do the math.) But here’s the thing – if I’d started losing a pound a week two years ago, or way back when the doctor suggested that, I’d be there today.

You see, we tend to think time will always be on our side, and whatever circumstances we’re facing today will somehow change. And, to be honest, they will. Only to be replaced by a whole new set of circumstances. That’s the reality of life. Things will never be perfect, and there will never be a perfect time to do the things we want. We have to make the most of the time we’ve got and, as a well-known comedian used to say, “Git ‘er done!”

I’ve always said I don’t want to spend my retirement sitting in a dark room watching the news. I want to enjoy my golden years, to do the things we’ve put off our entire lives, to get out and explore this big, beautiful world. Twenty years ago, that was still a long way off, and time (I thought) was on my side. But here I am now, and retirement is right around the corner. What I wouldn’t do to have back some of those years I waited, hoping circumstances would get better.

Be thankful for life’s blessings. Enjoy them to the fullest, and never take anything for granted. But that doesn’t mean you have to be so contented with your current situation that you never want more. It’s okay to dream of a better, more fulfilling life. In fact, it’s more than okay. It’s what keeps us alive and gives us a reason to get up each day and do our best to make a difference.

But dreams will only exist in our minds until we do something about them. Don’t wait for things to get better, or for the perfect opportunity to come along. Work around your circumstances. Make the time. Rearrange your schedule. Find alternatives. Get creative. Make it happen!

It may take a few months, or even several years. But remember, that goal isn’t going anywhere and every step you take gets you one step closer to your dreams. Take that first step now. Don’t let life pass you by. Time is our most valuable resource. Make the most of yours.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!