A Place Where Suggestions Become Reality

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a great start.

I’m getting a late start today, so this post may be a bit shorter than most of the others. And as I’m writing this, I’m hearing a loud chorus of “Woohoo!” in the background. I know I get a bit long-winded sometimes. It’s just part of my personality. I’ve never been known to be at a loss for words.

It means a lot to me that you folks take time to read these posts each day, and that some of you actually look forward to them. Not so much because you’re reading and commenting on something I wrote, but that you’re taking a few minutes each day to fill your mind with what I hope is a message of positivity and inspiration.

I’ve said this before, but our minds are like a sponge. When you put a sponge in any kind of liquid, it soaks it up. It may be the cleanest water, or the foulest-smelling spill, the sponge doesn’t care. Its job is simply to soak things up. And, regardless of what it is, the sponge will pretty much soak it up equally fast, and hold it a long, long time. Especially the nasty stuff.

There’s a part of your brain that creates conscious thought – it processes everything coming in to fully assess the situation, and then spits out its best-possible response. And that response is based on everything we’ve learned to that point in time, good, bad, or indifferent. Because everything we’ve learned over the years is there in your brain’s hard drive, just waiting to be used.

And much like a computer’s hard drive, there’s a part of the brain in which all input becomes a source of truth. If I were to misspell a word in this post (believe me, it’s happened), that word will be sent around the world exactly as I wrote it. If I’m lucky, the computer will put a red squiggly line under the word to let me know I made an error.

But the brain isn’t quite so gracious. The much larger part of your brain handles subconscious thought, and that’s the part where all those things we see and hear each day, the words we hear, the messages we read, and the things we experience, are stored away for instant recall. And every one of those bits of information, to that part of our brain, becomes a source of truth.

Have you ever watched a hypnotist onstage? It’s hilarious, the things they can make people say and do. And they’re not really “making” people do anything. All they’re doing is tapping into the subconscious mind, and then making suggestions. When you can bypass the conscious mind and go directly into the subconscious, every suggestion becomes real.

So, yes, it’s possible to filter out some of what goes into your subconscious if your conscious mind is actively on the job. The problem is, much like a magician’s sleight of hand, what you consciously see and hear is only part of the equation. They get you focused on one hand to keep your attention off the other. And that’s how negative thoughts slip unchecked into your subconscious.

So, be careful about the input you allow into your brain. You can’t control other people, or the things they say and do. But you can control the amount of time you spend around them, and the surroundings in which you choose to be. You control the things you read, the shows you watch, and dozens of other things that affect what feeds into your subconscious.

To the extent that you can control your surroundings, you can control what goes into your brain. Feed it with positive thoughts, and it’ll return positivity when you need it most. Control what goes into your brain. Garbage in, gospel out. You can’t filter out all forms of negativity, but you can certainly overpower it with the positive. And that, my friends, is the foundation of happiness.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Build Dreams on a Foundation of Possibilities

Good morning! I hope your day is starting off well.

Last week, my wife and I took our grandson out to dinner. It’s been a while since we were able to share some special time with just him, and we enjoyed it. Besides, being new to living on his own, I’m pretty sure his diet consists of whatever junk food he can get his hands on, and not very much of that. So, we wanted to make sure he got at least one good meal.

During dinner, he began to share some of his dreams. He wants to buy a new car, or better still, a truck. Not just a truck, but a big one that sits up high enough to drive over Toyotas without even flinching. He wants to move from his apartment into a house. And he wants to do all this in the next three months.

There’s nothing wrong with those goals. In fact, they’re pretty impressive. Especially for a 19-year-old with less than $10 in his bank account. I said the goals are impressive, not that they’re overly realistic. But, instead of shooting them down, we offered him some alternatives. Maybe move into a little bigger apartment and fix the car he’s got until he can save for something a little newer.

I remember those days all too well. Actually, it’s easy for me because I still have visions of things I can’t afford today and a lifestyle that’s above my current means. I used to draw pictures of boats I’d own someday. People say you should find pictures of the things you want because our minds think in pictures. Well, let me tell you, nothing is more detailed than a picture you draw from scratch.

My dad would let me go off into La-La Land for a while before he felt the need to pull be back down to reality. “Boy, you’re a dreamer!” If I had a dollar for every time I heard those words, I’d have all those boats. In fact, it got to be such a comical thing to me that I started naming them – Dreamer. Why not? I think most people would get it. In fact, it may even inspire a few others to dream.

I talk about dreams a lot in these posts, and for good reason. They’re important. They’re a part of our very being and, whether we’ll admit it or not, we all have dreams. There’s something every one of us wants. People like to say, “Just give me a close family and good health and that’s all I need.” That may be true. But there are still things they want. We all do.

When kids are little, we listen to their dreams and tell them, “You can do anything you want to do!” It’s important to instill that belief in them at a young age. But at some point between childhood and young adulthood, we begin to take those dreams away. And worst of all, we do it in the name of love. We hurt them to keep them from getting hurt.

I’ve never fully understood that, but I have to admit, I’m as guilty of it as anybody reading this. We see somebody with their head just a little too high in the clouds and feel some kind of responsibility to assist gravity in bringing them back down. And sometimes, it’s necessary. But it can become a habit to the point that, instead of looking for possibilities, we look for pitfalls.

When somebody shares a dream with you, there’s a reason. It’s not because they’re bragging or because they don’t have a grip on reality. They know reality – they live it every day. What they want is for you to build their enthusiasm a little and help them figure out how to do it. They want you to believe in them, just like you want others to believe in you.

And here’s the cool thing – when you believe in somebody else, you’re sharing that same belief in yourself. When you share possibilities, you begin to see possibilities. When you help somebody else succeed, you uncover the path to your own success. You can’t find the good in somebody else’s dreams without seeing the good in your own. It’s inevitable.

When somebody comes to you with a dream, humor them. Feel honored that they chose to share it with you. Instead of looking for barriers, look for possibilities. It takes the same amount of creative thought, but the results can be so much better.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Commitment Will Win Over Excuses Every Time

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a good start.

Each morning, as I wake up, my brain starts searching for something to write about that day. Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think about you folks as I’m going through my morning routine – showering, shaving, getting dressed, and making that all-important first cup of coffee.

Sometimes, I’ll go to bed knowing what I want to write about. If I’m really doing well, I get it written before I call it a night. But that doesn’t happen very often. When you’re 61 and get up before the sun each day, the brain starts slowing down not long after dinner. I always wondered why old people go to bed so early all the time. I’m starting to understand.

So, I get up in the morning and spill out my thoughts, hoping there’s some little thread of inspiration I can share. And I’ll admit, some days are better than others. There are days when the words just flow, and I get a little smug with pride when I’m done. And other days, I give it my best shot and think, “There’s always tomorrow.”

People have asked me how I’m able to do this each day. And the answer is pretty simple – I made a commitment. Sixteen months ago, I decided to get up each morning and share some words of inspiration. Worse yet, I let people get used to it. After a while, they began to expect it, maybe even look forward to it. And the last thing any of us wants is to let down a friend.

Two weeks ago, when we were on the road to Nebraska, I had to skip a day. I wasn’t really able to give advance notice, because it’s not always wise to let the world know you’re going out of town. But before noon that morning, an old friend sent a message saying she missed that day’s post. So, that night, I sat in the hotel and drafted a post for the next day. When there’s a will, there’s a way.

It’s that way with most things in life. Just wanting something isn’t enough. You have to want it badly enough that nothing can stand in your way. It’s all about commitment. Because, until you commit, you’re just thinking about it. You may even go through the motions, but excuses are easy to come by. And any time you need one, life will be more than happy to provide it.

Sure, there will be times when things legitimately get in the way. When I had brain surgery last year, I knew there would be a period of time that I wouldn’t be able to sit at the computer and write. And, thankfully, a close friend saw the dilemma before I even mentioned it and asked if she could fill in. For those of you who were blessed to read Mary’s words, I know you gained from it.

Making a commitment doesn’t mean challenges go away. In fact, they can multiply because you’re no longer just cruising along, taking life as it comes. You’re plowing forward through the defensive line with one objective – reaching the goal. And, trust me, that defensive line will throw some blocks. It may even try to tackle you. But when the goal is clear, none of that matters. You just press on.

I spoke to a friend over this past weekend. We’re in business together, and he’s my mentor. I shared my goals and made a commitment. Then I asked him for one thing – hold me accountable. Because when I’m only accountable to myself, I tend to make excuses. I’ve seen me do it.

But when you make yourself accountable to somebody else, things change. You know that call is coming every week, and the last thing you want to tell them is that you didn’t do any of the things you set out to do over the week. Whether we’ll admit it or not, we all want approval – on the job, at home, amongst family, and in most things we do. It’s just human nature.

It takes work to accomplish our goals. Some things require more effort than others, and the bigger the dream, the more you’ll have to do to achieve it. Until you make a commitment, it’s just a whim. And whims can never stand up to the weight of excuses. You have to decide that nothing can stand in your way – and then back that up with a resolve that can’t be shaken.

And one of the best ways to do that is to make yourself accountable to somebody else – somebody who has your best interests at heart and won’t let you get away with excuses. And maybe you can return the favor or do the same for somebody else. Because, in the act of helping another person succeed, you move closer to your own goals. And what a fantastic way to get there!

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Memories – The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Good morning! I hope you all had a fantastic weekend.

The weather finally broke here in southern Ohio, and lots of people were out enjoying it. I have to say, it felt nice to go outside in short sleeves without feeling cold. We took my granddaughter to the zoo and, other than the punishment I got from my lower back for all the walking and standing around, it was an awesome day.

This is also the time of year when people start thinking about their summer vacations. Some already have their destination picked out. In fact, a young woman I work with has resolved to take a trip somewhere every month this year, and she can tell you for the next several months exactly where she’ll be. That has to feel pretty good.

We’ve got a couple of trips planned this year and we know where we’ll be going. We just don’t know exactly when. Between work and my surgery last year, we’ve spent the past few months catching up. And, I’ll be honest – I don’t know that we’re really making any headway, because the things we need to do are multiplying faster than we can get them done. Know the feeling?

But there’s a point where you have to just drive a stake in the ground and schedule some “me” time. If you wait for things to settle down, you’ll be waiting a long time. We all need a little down time, but life doesn’t seem to care much about that. If it sees an opening, a time when you don’t have much going on, it’ll fill that gap faster than you can say “Whew!”

I’ve read several articles about work and the toll it takes on us, both mentally and physically. And I’ve read others about our obsession with stuff … amassing as many possessions as possible, as early in life as possible, to the point that all we do is work for our possessions. A bigger house, a fancier car, the best entertainment system, all things we can certainly enjoy, but at what expense?

There comes a point where every day we get out of bed and go to work just so we can either make the monthly payment on what we’ve already bought or set aside money for the next purchase. But when you ask people where they’re going on vacation, the answer is often, “We’re staying home. We’ve got a lot of yard work to catch up on and I just need some time to relax and do nothing.”

The key point in every one of those articles I read was that all the hours we worked and all the stuff we amassed are only a means of keeping score in a game that nobody ever wins. And every one of those possessions will eventually wear out and need to be replaced. But memories last a lifetime and beyond. And memories usually aren’t built on the job or sitting in front of a big-screen TV.

The fact is, every day we move closer to a goal that we didn’t set and our date with destiny is something over which we have very little control. Every day between now and then is a chance to make the most of life, to experience things we’ve only dreamed of, and to build memories that will see us through those frail years after we’re no longer able to get out and see the world.

Make time to do the things you want to do. Make a list and start checking things off instead of crossing them off. There is nothing you can take with you when this life is over, and the possessions you’ve amassed will mostly be sold at auction because they just don’t hold a lot of sentimental value. But the memories can’t be sold, and the sentimental value they hold can’t be measured.

We all have things we need to do, and work is one of them. You can’t really escape that. But a healthy work/life balance needs to be part of it. And any time you start thinking you just can’t take time off because there’s too much to do, consider how quickly the company will replace you if you were to become incapacitated. And think of all the things you’d have missed along the way.

There’s an old saying – work hard and play hard. For too many of us, that second part gets lost in the first. Be good at your job. Be dedicated and reliable. But never forget the responsibility you have to yourself and your family. Life is about more than just a paycheck. Make time for yourself and build those memories. It’s the one possession that truly lasts forever.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

The Joys of Being New

Good morning, and happy Friday! I hope your day is off to a great start.

We got some new neighbors yesterday. I don’t really know anything about them, other than they have two small children who seem to be really friendly – when I stopped over to introduce myself, both came running to me for a high-five.

The mother was interested in knowing what kind of neighborhood we live in. I stressed how quiet things are, because … well, the last people who lived there needed a reminder their very first day. A loud party complete with drinking, fireworks, and cars racing down the street was a little more than the rest of us could tolerate. So, we had a chat. We didn’t hear much from them after that.

We all tend to strive for what’s become comfortable, whether it’s on the job, around the house, across the fence, or even in church. It’s amazing how habitual people are in where they sit on Sunday morning. Better still, let them find that a visitor came in and took their seat, and they just stand there for a minute, as if they have no idea they’re allowed to sit somewhere else.

And it’s the same way in our neighborhood. We all have a place where we park our cars. If it’s on the street, we’re on the honor system, because it’s public property and we don’t own the area in front of our homes. When we set out our trash cans, we put them in the same place every week, hoping somebody won’t park in front of them. We’re all creatures of habit. And habits are hard to break.

So, when somebody new moves in, it’s only natural for the neighbors to open the blinds, step back from the window just enough to avoid being seen, and subject the new residents to a full-blown visual inspection. We not only watch the people, but the things they take out of the moving van.

If they have lots of toys, we assume there are small children. Bicycles mean the kids are a little older. Mismatched furniture means they’re just getting started in life and may not have figured out the best (and quietest) way to settle disagreements. And a bunch of posters and mirrors advertising their favorite brand of whiskey is usually not a good sign. These are the things we notice.

And I remember when we were the new family moving in. It’s been almost 17 years ago, and we’re still not among the old-timers on the block. In fact, I only know of three families that are newer than us. People tend to hang around a long time, and they want to maintain the lifestyle to which they’ve become accustomed. Around here, that means friendly and quiet, thank you very much.

The day we closed on our house, before we even loaded the truck to move in, we stopped by to go inside for a quick look around. The realtor had given us the code for the lock box, but as it turned out, somebody had locked the storm door and the lock box was hanging inside it on the main door. So, we stood there trying to figure out what to do. That’s when we met our first neighbor.

She came down and asked if we needed a screwdriver. Okay, here are strange people trying to figure out how to break into the vacant house and the neighbor is offering to share burglary tools? That’s comforting! I told her we’d just bought the house and she said, “Oh, I know!” She then went on to ask about my job (she already knew where I worked) and a few other trivial things.

That’s when it occurred to me that the neighbors had already scoped us out. And over the next few days, we were welcomed by a few more neighbors and a police officer who let us know we were living on the quietest street in town with a neighborhood watch that was second to none. Suffice to say, I gave my daughters a few words of instruction.

We’ve all been there, and we know how lonely that can feel. And we wonder sometimes how long it’ll be until we’re fully accepted by those around us. That’s why I stopped over to meet our new neighbors. It’s why I introduce myself to every new person at work, and it’s why I welcome visitors to church. I do it because people did it with me, and I know how good that feels.

Each of us, every day, has the opportunity to make somebody feel more comfortable and secure. We have the opportunity to shake a hand, share a smile, and make them feel noticed. It costs nothing, but it means everything. And it’ll make you feel pretty good as well. Give it a try!

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

It’s All About the Choices We Make

Good morning! I hope your day is starting off well.

As many of you know, I’ve been on a journey to lose weight. And it’s not just a few pounds I need to lose – we’re talking about a third of my body weight. I’ve had some good days and some not so good, but overall the good days are winning. Still, it doesn’t take much to set things back. One weekend on the road, sitting in a car and eating road food, is enough to turn things around.

It seems we always look for the perfect excuse to explain why we’re not doing the things we need to do. It’s too cold outside. It’s too hot. There’s nothing healthy on the menu. The gym is too crowded this time of day. My favorite TV show is on. And my all-time favorite … it was a buffet! What do you expect when you hand me an empty plate in front of all that food???

It’s all about choices, and we make them all the time, even when we’re not really thinking about it. I always got a kick out of people going into McDonalds and ordering a Big Mac, large fries, apple pie, and a diet Coke. Nice try, but at that point, I don’t think diet anything will do much good. You might as well just go for the real thing.

When I stepped on the scale this morning, it rewarded me for a weekend of poor choices. Okay, and a couple of days since the weekend as well. Once you get out of the habit of eating healthy, even for a few days, your body is so happy to have its comfort food back that you tend to just keep on going down the same path. At least I do. And it takes effort to turn it around.

Maybe the wiser choice would have been to just stay on the program in the first place. I have healthy things I could have taken on the road with me. I didn’t have to eat fast food. I could have eaten a salad instead of a burger. Or a plate of fresh fruit with breakfast instead of hash browns. The fact is, I looked at all the tasty things on that menu and threw weight loss right out the window.

Warm weather has finally arrived, and around my house, that means it’s time to fire up the grill. My wife loves grilling out, because I do it. Somehow, she’s never figured out how to light a grill or set the perfect cooking temperature. I’m beginning to think I shouldn’t have been so eager to learn how to use a washing machine, but that’s another story.

But even with the grill, we have choices. I can cook hamburgers and hot dogs, or I can cook skinless chicken and shrimp. I can cook barbecued ribs or lean pork. I can cook steaks or salmon. Okay, that last one is just for me. I’m not even allowed to cook it in the house and nobody else will eat it. Still, it’s a choice I can make. And I have little doubt I’ll make the wrong choice a bunch of times this summer.

And that’s okay. We’re only human. But when we make the wrong choice, we should at least try to minimize the damage with some of our other choices. And no, diet soda doesn’t count. Maybe some fresh fruit as a side dish, and a walk around the neighborhood after dinner. Maybe a healthy lunch on days when I know we’re having ribs for dinner.

And maybe it’s as simple as eating a little less of the bad stuff instead of gorging. People who are trying to lose weight call that a “cheat day.” They’ll even tell you it’s important to do that every now and then. I’m not so sure about that, but even if you do cheat a little, that doesn’t mean you have to go wild. Keep it in check and balance it with some healthier choices. Minimize the damage. That’s all.

We face choices every day. At work, at home, at mealtime, in family interaction, in our personal goals, at the grocery store, driving past the gym, and dozens of other times during the day. It’s the things we choose that make the difference. They shape our being, they shape our body, they shape our relationships, and they shape our future. Mistakes are inevitable. But keeping our eye on the goal is what determines where we end up.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

What Are You Waiting For?

Good morning, and happy Hump Day! I hope your day is starting off right.

As I returned to work yesterday from a few days off, I was met by a barrage of emails from coworkers, some sharing the outcome of work they’d done, and some asking me to pitch in and help. I spent most of the day sifting through those messages and catching up on the work I’d missed. If I hadn’t, it would still be there waiting for me today. Isn’t it funny how that works?

Employers pay us to take time off because they know we need a sanity break every now. And they also know that, in many professions, the only thing they’re missing out on is our physical presence, because we’ll work extra hard to clean our plate before vacation, and then again after we return to catch what we missed. The same amount of work gets done, so it really doesn’t cost anything.

Many jobs are that way. The work you need to do isn’t going anywhere, and nobody else will step in and do it for you. They’ve got work of their own. And it’s pretty much expected that you’ll do whatever it takes to stay caught up. Most companies will forgive mistakes, but they expect an honest effort to get the job done. Inaction is simply not an option.

It’s the same with the things you want to do for yourself, your personal goals and dreams. None of them will just materialize on their own without any input from you. They require action, and in the absence of action, nothing happens. Even winning the lottery requires that you go out and buy a ticket.

If you’ve taken time to plan the means by which you’ll achieve your goals, you probably have a pretty extensive “to-do” list. Some of it may be things you need to do one time, like opening a savings account or getting a vendor’s license. Those are the easy ones. Other things are ongoing – you need to do them every day, because they are the activities that truly lead you to your goal.

Like any other job, that work will sit there until you do something about it. And that’s where most of us fall down. We have the best of intentions, but life gets in the way. You work late and come home tired, the kids need help with their homework, the kitchen sink backs up, the lawn needs to be mowed – a dozen different things that all require your immediate attention. So, what gives?

Well, it’s easy to set aside those things we need to do for ourselves because they’re just not quite as urgent. Sure, we know they need to be done and sooner or later we need to get back on track. Maybe tomorrow. Or next week, or next month. As soon as the current crisis is over and things settle down at work, we’ll get moving again. Sound familiar?

Part of what stands in our way is the fear of making a mistake. If it’s that hard to get the job done today, who has time to do it all over again because we blew it the first time? This is especially true of anything that involves money. Mistakes can be costly and set us back to square one. So, we wait until we’re absolutely certain we have the perfect approach.

Okay, let’s get this out of the way right now … mistakes will be made. There’s no way to learn something new without a few errors. And, as the saying goes, to have something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done. It’s all new. And the whole way to your goal, you’ll have to stretch your boundaries and try new things.

But here’s the thing – the pursuit of your dreams will forgive mistakes. They may set you back a bit, and they may even cost a little money. But you can always undo a mistake. What your dreams won’t forgive is inactivity. You have to at least try.

It’s important to do the things you need to so you can be constantly moving closer to your goal. It may not go as quickly as you’d hoped, and there may be times you feel like you’re moving backward. But movement, in any direction, can always be corrected. Sitting still is a sin your dreams will never reward. You know what to do, so do it. Your dreams await. The next move is up to you.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Advice Can Change Dreams In An Instant

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a great start.

Have you ever decided there was something you were going to do, a goal you wanted to accomplish, but you didn’t want to tell anybody else? Making the commitment to do something positive should be one of the happiest moments of our life (aside from actually accomplishing it), but all too often we hold it in because we don’t want to deal with the inevitable responses.

You see, when you share a dream with somebody, rarely do they just say, “That’s awesome!” There’s always a more in-depth response, usually focused in one of three directions. Quite often, they’ll try to talk you out of it, explaining all the reasons it’ll never happen. You know, “for your own good.”

Others will tell you what a great idea it is, and how much they hope you succeed, because they want to be in your inner circle in case you actually succeed. But all too often, those same people are having a laugh at your expense around the water cooler. “Did you hear what Jim’s trying to do? And he thinks he can pull it off! I think he’s got a screw loose.”

And then, there’s that very small group who gives your plans a little thought, and then says, “You know what? That’s awesome! And I know you can do this. How can I help?” Okay, it’s not usually a group, even a small one. If you could find one or two people who respond in that manner, you’re among the truly blessed. Hang onto friends like that. They’re pretty rare.

But consider this – when somebody shares their dreams with you, how do you react? Do you look at the possibilities instead of the challenges? Do you focus on the qualities of that person that makes them most likely to succeed? Do you point out those attributes? Do you build their confidence? Do you offer to help?

More often than not, the reason we don’t share our dreams with others is because we know how we’d respond if they shared the same dream with us. We mean well. But nobody wants to see a friend bang their head against the wall trying to accomplish something the whole civilized world knows is impossible. Right?

So, instead of offering help and encouragement, we offer advice … well-intended, but very often, badly misinformed. Because, unless you’ve already done what they’re trying to do, you really don’t know what it takes to be successful. You may have read stories or heard people talk of their own failures. But that’s all second-hand knowledge. In a court of law, it would be inadmissible.

And, in all honesty, it’s inadmissible in the mind of the person receiving your advice. They don’t want to hear it. They’ve already decided to do something grand, and the last thing they want to hear is a litany of reasons they can’t succeed. So, all that insight you shared so freely goes in one ear and out the other. You may as well have saved your breath.

It would be great if that’s how the story ends. But it’s not. Because when you share your thoughts with another person, they don’t just go in one ear and out the other. A little bit sticks somewhere in the middle, whether the recipient wants it or not. It falls onto the subconscious, a place in the brain where every thought is truth, and every opinion is fact.

You may not have talked your friend out of their dream, but you have planted the seeds of doubt in their mind. They begin to question something that, before you came along, seemed certain. Let a few other people share similar thoughts, and before long failure becomes the expected result. They can’t shake that nagging thought – “Why are you even trying this? You know it’ll never work!”

When you see somebody who’s about to make a huge mistake, it’s natural to speak up. But there’s a fine line between keeping somebody safe and holding them back. And here’s the question – is it a huge mistake in your mind, or in theirs? What is the real cost? A little time? Some money? The ridicule of people who don’t share their vision? Maybe that’s a risk they’re willing to take.

Before you offer that advice, consider the potential impact against your expertise and motives. As a friend often says, there are a lot of thousandaires offering advice on becoming a millionaire. And there are a lot of entry-level workers with opinions on what it takes to become an executive.

Keep that in mind, as you offer advice to others and as you receive it from them. Every thought that enters our brain, verbally or otherwise, finds a resting place where it can have a profound effect on our ability to succeed. Make sure the thoughts you share and receive are worthy of that power.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Feed Your Brain the Good Stuff

Good morning! I hope you all had a nice weekend.

We spent the weekend 1000 miles from home, with a group of friends and business associates we haven’t seen since last year. It was great getting back together, seeing familiar faces, and sharing our common goals. Nobody even cared about the snow outside. In fact, some were actually excited about it because they’d never seen snow before. I guess it’s all a matter of perspective.

As I said in Friday’s message, there’s something about getting together with people who believe in the power of dreams. You feed off one another until there’s an energy in the room that just can’t be extinguished. And just in case anybody had doubts, we had an excellent lineup of speakers to reinforce that energy – people who have already accomplished more than most of us could even think about.

But you know, the reality is that not a one of those speakers has any special gifts or talents that set them apart from everybody else in the room. Sure, they have a more impressive list of accomplishments, and the confidence that comes from achieving those goals. But beyond that, they’re really no different than anybody else.

My mom always used to caution us against thinking too highly of somebody else, just because of their status or the things they’ve accomplished. “They put on their pants the same as you do, one leg at a time.” Okay, she had a couple of other analogies as well, but I won’t mention them here. Suffice to say she was pretty certain the bathroom exhaust fan works equally hard for all of us.

In my years as a stand-up comedian, I worked with several celebrities. Onstage, they were larger than life and the entire crowd was like putty in their hands. But back in the green room, they were no different than anybody else. They had the same hopes, the same fears, the same insecurities, and the same basic needs. No matter what a person has accomplished in life, that never changes.

Still, there was something about being able to sit in a room backstage and chat with somebody who knows how it feels to be on top of their game. Somebody who’s been where you are, knows what you’re up against, and has the benefit of experience to offer advice on avoiding some of the pitfalls and capitalizing on opportunities.

Something I’ve learned over the years is that, with very few exceptions, the people who are the most successful are the most willing to share their insight with others. They’ve grown past any feelings of concern that somebody else is out to take their place because they know that’s just not how it works. Besides, there are few compliments more sincere than somebody who’s willing to take your advice.

We all want to feel validated. That includes people who have racked up an impressive list of accomplishments, as well as those who are just beginning the journey. A sincere compliment can open the door for you to ask questions, maybe even ask for advice. And the validation they give you by sharing their insight in worth more than you may ever know. It tells you they believe in you.

Beyond that, there are the people seated at your table, who share some of the same goals and dreams. And the realization that you’re not alone, and that others want some of the same things you do, is a form of validation in itself. And if they believe they can do it, why shouldn’t you believe in yourself as well? Positive energy is as contagious as the flu. It’s just a matter of hanging around the right people.

A weekend conference of this type is worth whatever it takes to get there. But the fact is, these things only happen every now and then. The rest of the year, your positive affirmation is largely up to you. What you feed your mind in those quiet moments will shape the results you achieve. Feed it positive, reaffirming thoughts, and that’s the output you can expect. That’s when great things happen.

It’s been said that whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. You already have the dream. So, feed your belief. Read some good books, spend some time with people who are on the go, and celebrate those small wins as they occur. With every positive step you take, you’re that much closer to your goal. And just think of all the great friends you’ll make along the way.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Winning is Better With Friends

Good morning, and happy Friday! I hope your day is starting well.

I missed you folks yesterday. My day started abnormally early, so I wasn’t able to get my morning post out before I had to leave the house. Okay, I could have posted something, but I’d rather wait until I have time to do it right. You folks deserve my best effort. Sometimes that even equates to something good!

I talk a lot about dream-building – not only defining your dream, but going through the motions of experiencing it. Realtors have long known that when they have an open house on a home they’re trying to sell, the vast majority of people who visit are only there to ooh and ahh, to get ideas for decorating their own home, or to get a glimpse of a life that’s currently beyond their means.

In a previous life, I sold cars. And I learned really fast that, when a teenage boy comes in with his eyes on a Corvette that his dad has promised to buy him for graduation, hold off on the test drive until dad comes back with some cash. More often than not, they’re just out for a joy ride and the bragging rights that go along with it. “Dude, you should’ve seen me! That salesman was holding on for dear life!”

That said, we should all find those opportunities for dream-building. A couple of months ago, my wife and I went to an RV show. We’re not ready to buy just yet, but we wanted to get a feel for what’s on the market so we could go home and begin to finalize our list of must-have features. And there’s something to be said for sitting in the driver’s seat, or relaxing in one of the recliners. It allows you to experience the feeling of ownership, if only for a brief moment.

But, beyond dream-shopping, imagine what a few like-minded friends could do for your belief system. Spending an evening with people who share some your dreams, or have dreams of their own, and who believe they can achieve those goals, can have a profound effect on your belief in your own ability to succeed. Just like water-cooler gossip, being around people who believe in themselves is contagious.

Better still, hang out with somebody who’s already accomplishing their dreams. When your friend who’s still living in their parents’ basement talks of owning a waterfront mansion, the gleam in their eyes doesn’t do a lot to convince you it can happen. But when somebody who’s already living in such a home tells you it’s not that hard and that you can do it, you tend to pay a little closer attention.

And maybe your dreams aren’t as much about material things. Maybe you just dream of spending more quality time with a family that seems to be growing apart. Maybe you’d like to strengthen your marriage. Well, if you spend all your time with people who have already failed in what you hope to accomplish, odds are you won’t get any tidbits of wisdom from them.

But if you seek out people who are already living your dream and spend more time with them, some of their success will begin to rub off. You’ll see happiness instead of animosity, and you’ll find yourself trying harder to emulate them so you can experience some of that happiness for yourself. And in the process, you’ll find yourself growing closer to your own goal.

That doesn’t mean we have to turn our back on everybody who’s not successful. Some of them may want the same things as you, and they may need a successful friend to rub off a little on them. You may be the person they need most in their life. Just be careful to spend more time around happy, positive people so the negativity doesn’t rub off on you.

There are support groups for just about any negative habit you’d like to change, but not too many groups exist for the sole purpose of helping you build excitement in your dreams. Sometimes, you just have to be creative. Have lunch with a friend who just came back from an exotic vacation. Invite a close-knit family over for a Saturday cookout. Go to that after-work celebration for a co-worker who just got a promotion.

The more we associate with successful people, the more likely we are to succeed. Read some motivational books. Listen to some positive speakers. Find those people who have already achieved what you hope to achieve, and be a friend. Be there, not only for the good parts, but when they need your help as well. Because even the most successful people in the world still have dreams and you may be just the person they need to motivate them. You just never know.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!