With Each New Day Comes a New Chance to Succeed

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a fantastic start.

I had a nice weekend. Saturday, we got to meet with some good friends, including one we don’t get to see very often. They’re business associates, so we share a lot in common and spend a fair amount of time helping one another. In a world where most other businesses are in cut-throat competition with one another, it’s nice to be able to toss around ideas with people who are willing to share their best.

Our time together also made me come face to face with the fact that I’d set some goals leading up to this weekend, and I missed the mark completely. I’d like to say it was because of forces completely beyond my control, but the fact is, I just didn’t do the things I needed to do. It happens to the best of us, so I guess I’m in good company. But that’s not where I want to be.

And, as I thought through the many excuses I could offer, I was actually happy to accept blame for coming up short. Because, if this were truly due to some external force that has the power to keep me from accomplishing my goals, that would mean I have no power to overcome it. But I do have that power, and the only thing standing in the way is myself. This is mine to own, for better or for worse.

So, along comes a brand-new week with a brand-new chance to make things happen. What happened last week and all the weeks before is in the past. I can’t change that. But I can change what happens today. You can, too. Today can be a wearisome first day at the office, or it can be the beginning of great accomplishments. It’s whatever you want it to be.

My wife and I went out dream-building Saturday. I knew I’d missed my goal, and I felt the need to re-focus. We drove to an RV dealership in a neighboring city to check out the new models. Sadly, the inventory at that dealership wasn’t worth the drive, so we’re going to another one this weekend. Dreams are important, and you have to feed them. Without a dream, we’d never take the first step.

And with that dream revitalized, I woke up this morning thinking about my goals instead of the work that awaits at the office. Make no mistake, that work will take first priority when I get there, and I’ll do it well. But work only accounts for eight hours – the rest of the day is mine, and I get to use that time any way I want. You just have to find something that’s worth the effort. I’ve found mine.

Along with that renewed vision, I also renewed my goals. We’re allowed to do that. And therein lies part of the problem. We always know that if we miss our goal this week, another week is just a few days away. That’s a double-edged sword. On the one hand, it gives us a fresh opportunity to get moving in the right direction. On the other hand, it provides cover when we come up short.

I think the key is to forget about next week and just focus on today. Believe me, if you accomplish all your goals by the weekend, next week will take care of itself. There will be plenty of new things to fill our time, and with each of those new goals we’ll inch ever closer to our ultimate objective – the dream. Nothing is ever out of reach as long as you keep moving toward it.

If you’ve missed some goals in the past, that doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means you haven’t succeeded yet. Failure is admitting defeat. It means you never plan to try again. But success is always out there waiting to be claimed if you want it badly enough. All you have to do is refocus and get moving again. Keep doing the things you need to do, and success isn’t just possible – it’s inevitable.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

As Long As There’s Hope, The Dream is Still Alive

Good morning, and happy Friday! I hope your day is off to a great start.

It’s hard to believe the weekend is here again. Or, depending on your perspective, it could seem like it took forever getting here. For myself, that feeling changes through the week, and sometimes even throughout the day. It just depends what kind of day I’m having. Can I get an amen?

We all have good days and we all have some pretty lousy days. Between the stress of work, bills to pay, errands to run, and chores stacking up, some days can try our very soul. Throw in kids testing our patience and the occasional (I hope) disagreement with our significant other, and sometimes it feels like we’ll never get back on top. Then along comes a good day to bring it all back into balance.

It would be nice if life worked that way but, for most of us, a good day here and there doesn’t really bring everything back into balance – it just makes it easier for us to endure those other days as we wait for another good one to come along. Or maybe even a few in a row. Wouldn’t that be something?

Hope is what gives us the strength to carry on through those tough days. Hope that we’ll get this project finished on time. Hope that we’ll mend our relationships. Hope that we’ll lose that extra weight or get through this current illness. If it weren’t for hope, there’d be no sense trying.

If you took a jar, filled it with fleas, and then put a glass cover on top, the fleas would try to escape. They’d jump up, bump into the glass, and fall back down. In time, they’d realize the cover was there and jump just short of it. At that point, you could remove the cover and the fleas would stay in the jar. They’d never jump out, because they’d never know they could. They’d just stay in that jar and die.

It’s the same with hope. If you thought you could never accomplish a goal, you wouldn’t even try. If you tried and failed enough times in a row, it would be easy to quit. And if you didn’t think all your effort would someday lead to a more enjoyable existence, you’d probably stop trying. Meanwhile, that glass cover may have been removed, allowing you to jump as high as you want. If only you knew.

Every night, my dog wants to get in bed with me. He doesn’t really want to sleep there – he just wants to snuggle for a few minutes. And before any of you “no dogs in the bed!” types get your feathers ruffled, it’s my dog and my bed. He gets a bath, and he’s never had a single flea. Besides, he’s not a pet – he’s a member of the family.

Anyway, every night he stands at the end of the bed and whines as he makes anywhere from three to ten false starts at the single jump that’ll put him where he wants to be. It’s like he’s looking up at that mattress, wondering how we keep raising it higher every night, and his little brain is saying, “I think I can, I think I can!” Finally, he works up the nerve and makes the jump. He does this every single night.

It’s cute, but it illustrates an important point. The goal is right where it was from the beginning. It hasn’t moved and it’s not like we’ve surrounded it with a moat and stone towers. It’s just as accessible every night as it was the night before. All that’s changed is an eight-year-old dog’s confidence in his ability to reach the top.

We’re not so different. We see a goal and decide it’s something we want. We reach out and it’s not quite close enough. So, we take a step or two and we’re still not there. Then something gets in our way and we have to deal with that. Then something else comes along, and something else after that. After a while, we don’t reach out quite as far, because we’re not quite sure we’ll ever get there.

But here’s the thing – the goal hasn’t moved. It’s still right there where it was. And, unless we’ve taken a step backward, we’re no further away than we were before. What stops us from reaching that goal isn’t the obstacles that pop up along the way – it’s simply our perception of those obstacles and the power we think they wield. It’s a lack of hope.

No matter what kind of day you’re having, your goals are still out there waiting to be achieved. They say it’s always darkest before the dawn. And when the sun finally comes up, you often find yourself even closer to your goal than you’d imagined. As long as you stay focused and never lose hope, you’ll get there. And just think how much better it’ll feel when you do!

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

The Success You Achieve Is Never Less Than You Expect

Good morning! I hope your day is starting off well.

Yesterday I worked from home. It’s a benefit that’s available in my job, one that I rarely take advantage of, but it’s nice to have the option. No traffic, dress any way I want, and lunch is only a few steps away. Besides, it gave me the option to cook breakfast for my little ones. That’s always a special treat for them. Times like this go by fast and you can never have them back.

I guess that’s what it feels like to be retired. Okay, aside from that part about going downstairs to the office to work all day. I know people who retired early, some in their thirties. That doesn’t mean they stopped working completely. Just that they stopped working at a job that requires their physical presence every day and found something that offered a little more freedom.

And make no mistake, these people are earning much more money than most of us will ever dream of, simply because they were willing to do something most people won’t. I’m sure they put up with their fair share of ridicule and doubt. I’m sure there were days when they wondered if all that extra work would ever pay off. But it did, and because of that, they have choices most of us will never have.

In yesterday’s post, I touched on two important premises. First, the notion that success occurs when our dreams become bigger than our excuses. Dreams give us something to work for, a goal to achieve. They make us get out of bed a little earlier and work a little later. Excuses are simply a free pass for not doing the things we need to do. Except they’re not really free – they end up costing a lot.

The second premise I touched on was the habit of success. This is something we’ve talked about before, and you’ll probably hear more about it over the coming year because somebody we all know is writing a book about it. It’s simply the idea that small successes, repeated over and over, build a mindset that can no longer see the potential for failure. It can only visualize success.

Thomas Edison tried hundreds of different designs before he developed a practical, working light bulb. Others were able to produce light, but only for a few seconds before the filament burned out. At some point, they all gave up. Instead of building the habit of success, they gave in to failure. Edison continued, and we all know how that turned out.

What drives a person to keep trying in the face of so many failed attempts? It’s simple. He didn’t see any of those early attempts as failures, because each time he learned a valuable lesson – he learned what doesn’t work. And if you keep eliminating all the different things that won’t work, you eventually reach a point where all that’s left is what WILL work.

Commitment is an absolute requirement in building the habit of success. You have to know, from the very start, that nothing will keep you from reaching your desired goals. That doesn’t mean nothing will go wrong, or that obstacles won’t stand in the way. It simply means you won’t allow those things to keep you from doing what you set out to do. You will succeed, no matter what.

Belief is another important factor. Would you set out on a trip across the country if you had no confidence in your ability to complete the trip? Probably not. The expectation of failure is enough to keep most of us from ever embarking on a new venture. And the stronger that expectation is, the less likely we are to even consider it.

But when success is the expected outcome, we’re not so reluctant to try. And the stronger our expectation of success, the more determined we become. We dodge the potholes, ease our way across speed bumps, and roadblocks simply put us on a different path that may prove to be more enjoyable than the one we’re on. The obstacles are the same. All that changes is our reaction to them.

And that reaction is driven by one thing – the expectation of success. When you succeed at everything you do, you expect to succeed at anything you do. Give that some time to sink in. It’s important. When you can look back at a track record of success, no matter how minor, you begin to expect success in everything you do.

We all have that track record of success. You learned to walk. You learned to talk. You learned to read and write and master the multiplication tables. Arriving at work on time is a success. Every job you complete during the day is a success. And the more we focus on those successes, the less we think about failure.

There is nothing you can’t accomplish if you commit yourself to a goal and believe in the outcome. Build the habit of success and nothing will ever stand in your way.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Success Begins With a Dream, But Habits Drive the Outcome

Good morning, and happy Hump Day! I hope your day is off to a great start.

By lunchtime today, the week will be half over. That means you can celebrate the halfway point of all those things you wanted to do this week. You’re getting close, and the rest is just a downhill slide. By this time Friday, you’ll be looking at a short list of things to finish before you reach your goal. And they all lived happily ever after.

If it’s only that last sentence that sounds like a fairy tale, congratulations. You’re among the fortunate few. For the rest of us, everything in that paragraph has the makings of a fairy tale, including the part about the week being half over. We all know better. The week will continue through the weekend, and we’re nowhere close to being halfway to our goals for the week. We’re lucky if we even started.

If that’s your version of reality, you’re in good company. I’m sure there are statistics on this, but I don’t really feel like looking them up because they’d be pretty dismal. I’d venture to say most of us miss our goals on a fairly regular basis. Yet we get up each day, breathe in and out, and life goes on. In fact, after a while, missing goals becomes just a normal part of life. It just becomes a habit.

Now, I guess if you never set any goals in the first place, you wouldn’t have any reason to hang your head. You can’t miss the target if you never take the shot. And for some people, that’s their built-in defense mechanism against disappointment. “I know I’ll never accomplish that. Why make myself feel like even more of a failure? I’ll just keep doing what I’ve been doing. It’s not that bad.”

And, therein lies the problem – “it’s not that bad.” We not only allow ourselves to get comfortable with our current circumstances and convince ourselves we’re happy about it. We may have distant visions of a better life, and we may even dream a little. But what if, in the process of trying to build something better, we lose what we’ve got? “Things aren’t so bad. Don’t rock the boat.”

It’s all a matter of habit – something to which we’ve become completely accustomed to the point that we don’t even think about it. Everything from what time we get up each day to how we comb our hair, brush our teeth, and even the order of body parts that get washed first in a shower, is habit. You do the same thing the same way every day, and it becomes a normal part of life.

The same is true of our circumstances. We may think they’re controlled by external forces, like our family heritage, our neighbors, our co-workers, and most of all, the company payroll clerk. “If only I had more money, I could change this!” “If only they’d give me that promotion.” “If only I’d been born into a wealthy family.” “If only …” Yeah, fill in the blanks. The end result is pretty much the same.

Because, at the end of the day, it’s just an excuse for not doing anything to change our circumstances. It’s a habit. It allows us, at least in our own mind, to place the blame on some other person, thing, or event. “It isn’t my fault!” Well, okay. If that makes you sleep better at night, hang onto those excuses. But make no mistake, life won’t suddenly change just because it feels sorry for you.

It’s one thing to be content with your life. That’s a goal we should all strive to achieve. But being content doesn’t mean we can’t want something even better. It doesn’t mean we can’t set an even stronger example for our children. And it doesn’t mean we can’t get up each day and try a little harder to achieve even more in life. Being content isn’t living – it’s just a comfortable path to the end.

And it all comes back to habits. Are you in the habit of setting goals or avoiding them? Are you in the habit of working toward those goals or sitting there thinking about it? Are you in the habit of accepting accountability for your circumstances or making excuses? The answer to each of those questions feeds into another important habit – the habit of success.

Yes, success can become a habit, one that consistently leads us to bigger and better things. And it’s a habit every one of us can develop the same as we developed the habit of going to work. Success begins with a dream. It means setting aside those feelings of comfort and contentment and working toward something better. And it means doing that every day until we reach our goal. It’s a habit.

It’s been said that success occurs when our dreams are bigger than our excuses. Embrace your dreams and step over those excuses. Leave them behind for the next person. You’ve got bigger and better things to do.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

You’re Never Too Old to Dream

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a great start.

I was chatting with some friends last night and, as often happens with this group, our conversation drifted to the topic of dreams. Not in the sense you might think, with a roomful of people sitting around a table, eyes aglow as each described their greatest goal in life. But in the sense of growing older and a common sentiment that, as we continue to age, we hope we never stop dreaming.

That conversation started as we shared stories of our own parents, and even ourselves, in which the fire just kind of died out over the years. Not completely, at least in our own instances, because we all still have dreams we’re working toward. But sometimes the dream can be as simple as not allowing age and all its associated challenges to get in the way of living.

I know, for my wife and I, we just don’t go out anymore. We don’t visit friends, we don’t invite friends to visit us, we don’t get together with others for a Saturday outing or go out for a night of dinner, drinks, and music – all things we used to enjoy, but somehow over the years they just faded into the background. Now, we pretty much sit around the house. Real party animals, huh?

And, looking back, I can’t really put my finger on a point in life when that changed. But if I had to take a guess, it would be 1988, when I got out of the Navy and we moved back home. That’s 31 years for anyone who’s already run out of fingers and toes to add it up. I can’t recall a time since then when we’ve done much of anything outside the home except shop and take the occasional vacation.

Now, to some people, that sounds like Heaven on earth. I get it. We’re not all wired the same way, and we all have different interests. But in our case, and I think I’m speaking for both of us, we miss it. We would desperately love to get out and do more, just for the fun of being around friends. But when you allow yourself to stop enjoying that side of life for so long, you begin to forget how.

My mother-in-law was one of those people who could make friends anywhere in the world in a matter of seconds. I remember one time walking down a street past a historic home where the owners were sitting on the porch enjoying a beautiful day. She said hi, they said hi, one thing led to another, and the next thing I knew they were offering to give us a tour of their home. Wow.

So, how does that fit into the topic of dreams? Well, Jane always imagined a more affluent life and all the things that go along with it – possessions, friends, entertaining, you name it. And, for her, touring the home of somebody who was enjoying that lifestyle would somehow satisfy her own dream. She could live vicariously through others and did so for most of her life.

We all have dreams. Yet, much as my wife and I somehow put a lid on our socialization skills, people tend to shut down those dreams as they get older. Or, maybe the dreams don’t really go away – they just change. At the age of 90, a bigger house probably isn’t as important as the ability to step outside and take a walk. At that age, I imagine most people’s dreams involve their dreams for others.

Make no mistake – there are things I want in life and experiences I want to enjoy. But, as I get closer to the age of retirement, my dreams are more focused on what I want for my daughters and grandchildren. When I look at new opportunities today, I don’t think so much of how they could benefit me as how they could benefit my family. As Dad would say, that’s just part of growing up.

It’s easy to look at things as we get older and think, “That really wouldn’t interest me.” But let me ask you a question – if somebody had presented you with that same vision thirty or forty years ago, would you have been grateful for the opportunity? Is it something you may have acted upon? Could it have changed the course of your life, and possibly led you closer to where you’d like to be today?

And you know, as we look at these things through the eyes of those we care about the most, we sometimes get our second (or third) wind and think, “I’m not that old – why can’t I do that?” Few things make me smile quicker than the image of old folks with white hair boogie-boarding or skydiving. These are people who never stopped dreaming. These are people who live. These are the people I want to be. How about you?

That’s all for now. Keep those dreams alive and have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

It All Begins With Love – For Ourselves, and One Another

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a nice start.

I had a relaxing weekend. More relaxing than I’ve seen in months. It seems there were several times when I asked my wife if there was anything we needed to do, because I felt I had a lot more time on my hands than normal. I could get used to that. It felt good.

That said, there is no way I can ignore the carnage that took place within our nation over the weekend. Twenty-nine people dead in two mass shootings, not to mention additional acts of violence in Chicago and other cities across the country. The media will focus on El Paso and Dayton because that’s where the most people were killed in each incident. But let’s be honest – one is too many.

We watch the news of these massacres in shock, wondering what goes through people’s minds to make them do such things, and thankful it didn’t happen in our own community. Well, this time it did. The shooting in Dayton occurred a mere 15 miles from home. In fact, my route to work this morning will take me 100 yards from the site where nine people died Sunday morning.

I try never to get political in my posts, and this one will be no exception. It was my disdain for online political spats that led me to write a motivational post each day. I sincerely believe we can all achieve anything we want in life, and we truly deserve the best. But all those things don’t matter if we’re out shopping or enjoying an evening on the town and somebody comes in with a gun to end it all.

At some point, we all have to either accept this as a normal part of life or stand up and be heard. That time has come for me, personally, and I will choose the latter. That doesn’t mean the focus of my writing will change – it won’t. But I wanted to take one day to put my thoughts into words in the hope that I can help spread some shred of insight and maybe even some inspiration. So, here goes.

When something like this happens, we rush to our favorite go-to explanation. And, it always seems to boil down to two factors – mental health and guns. Two completely opposing explanations, each with its own ardent supporters and political agenda. And make no mistake, the two are both a huge part of the problem. But on their own, they can’t fully explain what’s happening in this country.

Yes, we do have a mental health crisis in this nation. It stems from our healthcare issues in general. When you allow people to die from curable diseases or price their lifesaving medicine so high they can’t afford it, that mentality doesn’t stop with physical healthcare. It’s exacerbated in mental healthcare because we can’t see those issues on a CT scan. It’s voodoo – we can’t understand it, so we tend to look the other way.

We also have a problem with accessibility to guns. I own a gun, and I fully support the Second Amendment as it was written. But I will never support the need for a private citizen to own a gun that was designed as or modeled after a weapon of war. Let’s be perfectly honest here. Assault rifles were designed for a single purpose – killing the greatest number of people in the shortest amount of time.

I know that last paragraph will ruffle a few feathers among the most ardent defenders of gun rights. I don’t care, and I won’t apologize. Until somebody can show me a single constructive or practical use for a weapon that’s not legal for hunting in any state, and that can cause such carnage in a matter of seconds, I will stand by my opinion. And I will force that opinion on every one of my elected officials.

It goes without saying that when you allow such a weapon to fall into the hands of somebody who’s predisposed to violence because of a mental health issue, bad things can happen. Now, factor in overt racism, hate, and fear, and the result is not only predictable, it’s inevitable.

We all tend to seek out opinions that support what we believe. And, no matter what you believe, you can find somebody whose words will bolster that belief. Most times, it just strengthens our resolve. But when our beliefs are based in racism, hate, or fear, it’s like pouring gas on a fire. It just builds and builds until it’s completely out of control.

That’s why we all need to be careful of the things we say, especially in an open forum where we have no idea who may be listening or what message they’re trying to glean from our words. And the greater our audience, the greater our responsibility for making sure we spread a positive message. That starts at the very top and works its way down to each and every one of us.

If we don’t hold ourselves accountable, we can’t point our fingers at anybody else. Yet, by the same token, if we don’t hold our community and national leaders accountable, we fail in our responsibility to demand that they represent our interests, our beliefs, and our values. We should not only expect this of those we place in a position of trust – we should demand it.

This has been an extra long post, and for that I’ll apologize. It’s not something you can address in a few short paragraphs, and it’s not something any of us can fix on our own. But the souls of 29 innocent people are crying out for this to end. If we look the other way, we’ve not only allowed them to die in vain, we’ve condoned the next massacre. Maybe it’ll happen someplace else. Maybe it won’t.

There are no easy answers to this problem. But I firmly believe we have to recognize each of the factors that allow such things to happen and tackle them simultaneously. We need better access to mental health care, and we need zero access to weapons designed for mass killing. And we all need to stand up against hate in all its evil forms, openly and loudly. We can’t afford to sit on the sidelines any longer.

I’m sure I’ve offended a few people in this post and, as I said earlier, I won’t apologize for that. What I will say is that we’re all on this planet together, and we all are equally entitled to our own beliefs. What matters the most isn’t whether we agree or disagree on any one point – it’s how we handle those disagreements. We can set a positive example or not. Either way, the world is watching.

That’s all for now. Have a blessed day.

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

A Boat That Isn’t Rocking Isn’t Going Anywhere

Good morning, and happy Friday! I hope your day is off to a great start.

Forty-three years ago, almost exactly to the minute, I was sitting outside a Navy recruiter’s office in Fort Lauderdale waiting for my recruiter to arrive and take me to a land far, far away. At least that’s how it felt. Over the next several hours, my life would change in ways I could never imagine. And over the next 12 years, I was slowly (and sometimes not so slowly) changed into the person I am today.

I’ve often wondered where I’d be today if I hadn’t chosen that path in life. I had opportunities for some pretty high-paying work as a commercial artist – you know, back when people drew pictures instead of computers. But, as a result of my time in the Navy, I followed a more technical path and ended up with a job that suits my personality completely. I’m pretty happy with the outcome.

It’s easy to look back and wonder how our lives may have changed if we’d done things differently. I look at mistakes I’ve made over the years and I wish I hadn’t made some of those choices. But everything we’ve done in life, both good and bad, has led us to where we are at this very moment. One minor variation along the way would have changed our lives completely.

So, here’s the question – if we can so clearly see how the decisions we’ve made have led us to where we are now, why is it so hard to see how the choices we make today will affect the rest of our life? We always seem to think as long as we don’t change anything, we’ll continue on our current path indefinitely. “Things are going fine – don’t rock the boat.” Sound familiar?

But the reality is, a boat that isn’t rocking at least a little isn’t going anywhere. In fact, it’s probably not even in the water. Now, boats may look real pretty sitting there on dry land, but they completely miss their only intended purpose until they’re allowed to roll with the wind and waves. And in doing so, we accept the risk that, sooner or later, storms will come. It’s just part of owning a boat.

And it’s part of anything we do in life. Starting a family is one of the most wonderful blessings we’ll ever experience. To see a baby come into this world, one that’s of our own flesh and blood, is nothing short of incredible. Yet, with the first poopy diaper, we realize it’s not all marshmallows and roses. A thousand diapers later, reality starts to set in. This will be an E-ticket ride to the very end.

Now, we could have made the choice to just leave things as they were. “We’re doing fine, just the two of us. Life is good. Don’t rock the boat.” And I know a lot of people who have made that very choice. It works for them, because we all have different values. Sure, they’ll never know the thrill of holding a grandchild in their arms. But they’ll never know the heartache of seeing their child in tears.

We all make choices every day. To some degree, each of those choices will have an impact on our life moving forward. Even the breakfast sandwich I defrosted last night. I know the nutritional value in that sandwich, and suffice to say it’s not the best choice I could have made. Even now, I have the option to take it to work with me or just leave it there. I know the decision I’ll make. We all do.

I probably won’t feel any immediate effects from eating a sausage & egg biscuit instead of a bowl of oatmeal. But over time, those choices do stack up. Much like the other choices we make on a less frequent basis. Do you take a class to develop a new skill or spend that time at home? Do you start that business, or stick with what you know? Do you ask that girl out, or play ball with your friends?

The choices we make today will have some level of impact on our life, some more than others. And not making a choice is a choice in itself. You may think you’ll stay right where you are, but the reality is, you’ll just sit still as the world passes you by. The most beautiful home will eventually fall down if nothing changes.

Rock the boat. Take a few risks. A whole new life is waiting to be discovered. There will be some storms along the way. But unless you’re willing to go through those storms, you may never know the wonders that await on the other side.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

We Value Ourselves as We Value Others – Think Big!

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a great start.

I slept a little later than normal today. It happens, especially when you don’t use an alarm clock. I haven’t used one in the past 20 years. Which is probably no big deal, because I never woke up to one before that. I was late for everything. But two days after I stopped smoking, I started waking up all on my own, and early. Real early. There’s something to be said for the ability to exchange oxygen.

But that’s a topic for another day. Today I want to continue with some of what we’ve been talking about this week – this idea that we all deserve the success we desire. Dreams are where it all begins, and dreams are often where it all ends. There’s a whole cemetery full of unfulfilled dreams, and it lives within the minds of everyone who ever let one of their dreams die.

To be fair, some dreams need to die. Some things we want may not be in our own best interest, or in the best interest of those we care about. Some can be downright destructive. And others may seem attractive on the surface, but the more we think about them, the more we realize it’s probably not what we really want. So, it’s no great loss when those dreams fade away.

But the greatest obstacle to achieving our dreams isn’t money, or skills, or even just plain luck. We can earn more money, build more skills, and change our own luck. But it’s hard to do any of those things with that nagging voice in your head that says you’ll never attain your goal because you don’t deserve it.

This is often the result of mistakes of the past, or even choices we made over the years that have led us to where we are now. I never went to college. I got my technical training in the Navy. But when I look at all the successful people around me, most of them have an advanced degree. So, what makes me think I deserve their level of success?

I’ve made a lot of mistakes over the years. Most weren’t simple mistakes – they were just bad choices. Things I did with the best of intent, but knowing deep down it wasn’t the best thing to do at that point in my life. And we paid the price for those mistakes. One bankruptcy, two foreclosures, a failed business, and all the heartache that goes with it. Why do I deserve anything better?

It all begins with how we perceive our own value, and that begins with how we perceive those around us. If I look down my nose at everybody who’s ever suffered financial loss, who have lived in poverty most of their life and keep making the same mistakes, my perception of those people becomes my perception of myself. It’s like that big mirror just keeps popping up every time I form an opinion.

That’s one of the reasons I scrubbed my social media “friends” list a couple of years ago. It wasn’t so much that I got tired of all the negativity, politics, and downright despicable comments from others. I got tired of how it was affecting me. Because every time I caught myself thinking any negative thoughts, I automatically associated myself with my opinion of those other people.

The first step in improving our opinion of ourselves is improving our opinion of those around us. That doesn’t mean we have to agree with everything they say and do. It doesn’t even mean we need to like them. But unless we value others, we can never value ourselves. And valuing ourselves is the foundation of knowing we deserve something better.

You probably wouldn’t pack your golf clubs and drive three days to reach an exclusive members-only country club, knowing the whole time you don’t qualify for membership and couldn’t afford it even if you did. It’s that way when we begin chasing a goal that would elevate us to a level we’re not sure we deserve. Maybe we should just be content to stay right where we are and make the most of it.

If you’re happy where you are right now, that’s okay. Nobody says you have to change a thing. But make no mistake – whatever level of success you’d like to achieve in life, you deserve it. Don’t worry about the past. You can’t change it, and we’ve all made mistakes. But you can change your future. The success you deserve tomorrow begins with what you do today.

You are a person of unmeasurable value. You have gifts to share with this world that you may not have even discovered. And you deserve the best this world has to offer. It all begins with how much you value yourself and others. Because, when you can reconcile in your mind that anybody else is deserving of success, you automatically put yourself in the same category.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Don’t Let Fear of Success Stand in Your Way

Good morning, and happy Hump Day! I hope your day is starting off well.

Years ago, I was working on an invention. It was one of those things that has eluded mankind for centuries and, if successful, would have revolutionized the world of machinery. Imagine, if you can, free energy – an engine that operates with no source of power other than itself. The idea was brilliantly simple. And, as it turns out, it was simply not possible. At least not in that form.

I remember my dad telling me that if it worked, I would be a billionaire. That’s a lot of zeros with a capital B. As I explained it to my daughters, along with strict instructions not to share that information with anybody, my youngest began to realize how our lives would be changed, even everyday things like going to a public park. And I’ll never forget what she said next.  “Daddy, I hope it doesn’t work.”

We talk a lot about dreams and success, and how fear of failure can keep us from taking the steps necessary to succeed. But there’s another factor that plagues us almost as much – fear of success. No matter how badly we want things to change, there’s a certain comfort in knowing what to expect each day.

Success means change, and that means moving into the unknown. It means moving toward a life we may be able to imagine, but with the realization that we can only imagine parts of it. The rest will unfold as we move closer to our goal, and there may be elements of that life we hadn’t considered. That may not deter us from chasing our dream, but it does add a level of uncertainty in the outcome.

It’s been suggested that, if you were to divide all the wealth in the world equally among every person alive, within five years all that money would be right back where it started. That’s a sobering thought. And I know what you’re thinking. “Not me! Give me that kind of money, and I’d be rich for the rest of my life!” That’s what people think when they win the lottery. Yet 70% end up broke within a few years.

Part of that is simply the concept of working for something, knowing you’ve earned it and the appreciation of that reward when it comes. In “The Miracle Equation”, Hal Elrod talks about entitlement, the belief that we deserve something we want for one reason or another. It’s often interpreted in the negative sense as the belief that the world owes us something more than what we’ve earned.

But entitlement also means focusing on a goal and working toward it relentlessly, no matter what results you may achieve (or miss) along the way, and knowing that because of all that work, you deserve whatever it is you’re working toward. It’s a sense of validation that we all need as we move toward our goal. Why do you deserve the life of success? Because you’ve worked for it.

As we move toward that goal, we’ll undoubtedly discover new things we’d never considered at the outset. It’s like taking a trip across the country. You map it out and can even visualize all the big cities and attractions you’ll encounter along the way. But the true magic of the journey is all those little treasures you never knew about until they were right there in front of you.

And make no mistake – you’ll have to go through a lot of detours and treacherous terrain to reach some of those treasures. But you get through because the goal is bigger than any immediate hazard. You know what’s waiting at the end, and inconveniences become little more than speed bumps. With every mile and every setback, you’re that much more resolved to reach your goal.

And it’s that resolve that carries you through the unknown – both along the way and once you reach your final destination. Success is rarely everything we thought it would be. And there will undoubtedly be some surprises once you reach that goal, some better than others. But it’s the experience you gain along the way that will enable you to deal with those issues once they arise.

If you put an indoor plant on the front porch in the heat of summer, it probably won’t survive. The change is too rapid, and the plant doesn’t have time to adapt. But that same plant, growing in an outdoor flower bed from springtime through the summer, will thrive all season long. And, depending on the type of plant, it may even survive a harsh winter and bounce back next year all on its own.

Success involves change. There’s no getting around that. But in making the changes necessary to achieve success, you prepare yourself for any unplanned changes that come as a result. It’s that gradual progression that enables you to adapt. And it’s the knowledge that you deserve whatever success you can achieve, simply because you were willing to work for it.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved

Success Lies Just Beyond Your Comfort Zone

Good morning! I hope your day is off to a great start.

When was the last time you tried something completely new? Maybe it was something creative, like knitting or woodworking. It could have been something as complex as learning to write software code, or as simple as using a new cell phone. Okay, that last one isn’t always so simple. But you get the idea. We try new things all the time. And rarely are we as good at the outset as we’d like to be.

I remember learning to drive. It’s one of the simplest things we do – in fact, judging by some people on the road, it takes no brains at all. But in the beginning, it wasn’t so easy. And for those like me who had to learn in a car with a manual transmission, just getting the car to go uphill from a dead stop was nothing short of a miracle. But we learned. And all these years later, it’s second nature.

I talk a lot about goals and dreams. There’s a reason why. Unless you’ve already accomplished everything you want in life, you have goals. They may not be in writing, and they may not even be all that well defined. But to accomplish anything new means to set a goal and work toward it.

To have something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done. Those of you who have been with me a while have heard that before. It’s one of my favorite quotes, originally attributed to Thomas Jefferson. And if you think about it, there are really no exceptions to that rule. You can’t move ahead without breaking new ground.

The problem with breaking new ground, much like learning how to drive a car with a manual transmission, is that the first few times out can pretty well suck. You dump the clutch and stall the engine. You let it out too slow and roll backward. You hit the brakes in a panic and stall the engine. You miss gears, grind gears, and at least once you accidentally try to shift into reverse.

It’s all part of the learning process. And getting the car rolling is the hardest part, because once you have momentum on your side, it’s easy to shift into the next gear. Eventually I got good. Good enough, in fact, that I learned to drive a 13-speed semi. I could even parallel park that rig between two other trucks. There’s another driving lesson we’d like to forget.

What stops us from moving toward our goals usually isn’t a reluctance to actually do the work. We know the reward is worth the effort. It’s the realization that we have to try something new. Maybe we’ve done something similar, but that hasn’t led us to our goal on its own. So, we have to do something we’ve never done before. And that can be scary.

Back in the 1980s, I wanted to learn woodworking. I picked up a little saw and a piece of pine and made a paper towel rack. That came out pretty decent, so I made a spice rack. That one was a little more complicated but came out a lot better. And with each successive attempt, I got better. Finally, I learned to build clocks and furniture. Was it worth the effort? Absolutely.

That’s not to say I didn’t have to throw some pieces in the trash and start over. And there’s nothing like finishing what you think is a masterpiece, only to watch the joints separate the first time the weather changes. You make mistakes, and you learn not to repeat them. Eventually, I got a job building furnishings for world-class yachts. It just took time, practice, and a lot of patience.

In any worthwhile pursuit, you’ll have to try new things. Because the fact is, if what you’ve been doing all along hasn’t led you to your goal, it’s never going to. We all know the old saying about doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. If we want things to change, we have to do something different. We have to be willing to learn. And we have to be willing to make a few mistakes.

Sometimes, that “something different” is so different you can’t even imagine yourself doing it. It’s never been your thing, and it would stretch your comfort zone beyond anything you’ve ever experienced. Good. That’s what it takes. Your comfort zone has led you right to where you are today, and it’ll never take you any further. But if you give it a little tug, it’ll stretch. Trust me.

Even Beethoven once struggled to play Chopsticks. If there’s something you want to accomplish, all that’s standing in your way is that comfort zone. Set it aside and be willing to fail. Each time you do, you’ll get better and better until success is simply a matter of making the decision to try.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

© 2019 Dave Glardon – All rights reserved