Winning is Better With Friends

Good morning, and happy Friday! I hope your day is starting well.

I missed you folks yesterday. My day started abnormally early, so I wasn’t able to get my morning post out before I had to leave the house. Okay, I could have posted something, but I’d rather wait until I have time to do it right. You folks deserve my best effort. Sometimes that even equates to something good!

I talk a lot about dream-building – not only defining your dream, but going through the motions of experiencing it. Realtors have long known that when they have an open house on a home they’re trying to sell, the vast majority of people who visit are only there to ooh and ahh, to get ideas for decorating their own home, or to get a glimpse of a life that’s currently beyond their means.

In a previous life, I sold cars. And I learned really fast that, when a teenage boy comes in with his eyes on a Corvette that his dad has promised to buy him for graduation, hold off on the test drive until dad comes back with some cash. More often than not, they’re just out for a joy ride and the bragging rights that go along with it. “Dude, you should’ve seen me! That salesman was holding on for dear life!”

That said, we should all find those opportunities for dream-building. A couple of months ago, my wife and I went to an RV show. We’re not ready to buy just yet, but we wanted to get a feel for what’s on the market so we could go home and begin to finalize our list of must-have features. And there’s something to be said for sitting in the driver’s seat, or relaxing in one of the recliners. It allows you to experience the feeling of ownership, if only for a brief moment.

But, beyond dream-shopping, imagine what a few like-minded friends could do for your belief system. Spending an evening with people who share some your dreams, or have dreams of their own, and who believe they can achieve those goals, can have a profound effect on your belief in your own ability to succeed. Just like water-cooler gossip, being around people who believe in themselves is contagious.

Better still, hang out with somebody who’s already accomplishing their dreams. When your friend who’s still living in their parents’ basement talks of owning a waterfront mansion, the gleam in their eyes doesn’t do a lot to convince you it can happen. But when somebody who’s already living in such a home tells you it’s not that hard and that you can do it, you tend to pay a little closer attention.

And maybe your dreams aren’t as much about material things. Maybe you just dream of spending more quality time with a family that seems to be growing apart. Maybe you’d like to strengthen your marriage. Well, if you spend all your time with people who have already failed in what you hope to accomplish, odds are you won’t get any tidbits of wisdom from them.

But if you seek out people who are already living your dream and spend more time with them, some of their success will begin to rub off. You’ll see happiness instead of animosity, and you’ll find yourself trying harder to emulate them so you can experience some of that happiness for yourself. And in the process, you’ll find yourself growing closer to your own goal.

That doesn’t mean we have to turn our back on everybody who’s not successful. Some of them may want the same things as you, and they may need a successful friend to rub off a little on them. You may be the person they need most in their life. Just be careful to spend more time around happy, positive people so the negativity doesn’t rub off on you.

There are support groups for just about any negative habit you’d like to change, but not too many groups exist for the sole purpose of helping you build excitement in your dreams. Sometimes, you just have to be creative. Have lunch with a friend who just came back from an exotic vacation. Invite a close-knit family over for a Saturday cookout. Go to that after-work celebration for a co-worker who just got a promotion.

The more we associate with successful people, the more likely we are to succeed. Read some motivational books. Listen to some positive speakers. Find those people who have already achieved what you hope to achieve, and be a friend. Be there, not only for the good parts, but when they need your help as well. Because even the most successful people in the world still have dreams and you may be just the person they need to motivate them. You just never know.

That’s all for now. Have an awesome day!

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